January 17, 2012
So my perception of fame has changed a lot sine October 5, 2007, when I decided that I wanted to be famous. I mean, there was always a bit of God in my motives, but I think I’d be a liar if I said He was my main, driving force. No, it was my love for attention, my passion for entertainment, that spurred that goal. And goodness, what a despicable goal. “I want to be famous.” That’s not about the work or my talents, but the glory. I wanted to be known.
Cue four years of God changing my heart. There’s little doubt that He put some form of that desire on my heart. It was just my human nature - that pesky flesh - that took ahold of it and corrupted it, leaving God with a lot of work to do within me before I could get anywhere.
And goodness, there’s no way I cannot believe in the Lord, His power, and His love, because it was not on my own accord or just by way of life that the desire I had for fame - a desire that literally ate at my stomach for weeks: it was such a striking, physical sensation constantly stabbing at me until it practically led me to despair - was steadily transformed into a distinct opposition against having such a goal.
God revealed to me the selfishness of my heart. Even though in the “peaks”of my desire for fame I did truly want to use it as a means to share God’s love widely, there were also other motivations there that were distinctly not of God’s character. He chipped away at that steadily, though - thank goodness - to the point where I became completely averse to fame. I truly felt like having fame was an undesirable thing that I wouldn’t at all be happy with - and believe me, that’s a complete 180 from where I was at 18, 19, and some of 20.
God was not finished with me there with this fame thing, however. He began to bring my attention to certain things. Twitter, for starters, and the celebrities with literally millions of followers, who were just wasting that. Celebrities who have at times said they have a faith in Christ, yet not mentioning a single thing about Him ever. Five million people at their disposal, ready to be influenced - gosh, what a platform that would be. And celebrities are rarely against pushing their own agendas - social, political, personal - and it’s often to incredible results, but there’s not really anyone in such a position of social influence doing that for Christ…
Which brings in Exhibit B - Tim Tebow. The now famous NFL quarterback who does not hesitate to throw all glory to God, to preach the Gospel openly, to live in the love of Jesus. And people are taking notice. By not being afraid to use his position in the spotlight to share the message of Jesus, he is reaching so many. And it began to dawn on me - the advantage of fame. Though still convinced in the selfishness of pursuing fame, especially in the way that most do, I can see now that if I were to become famous, the possibilities are endless. The key would simply be to make fame not at all, even in the least bit, for my glory, but entirely for God’s. To turn it over completely to Jesus. His fame, essentially. Not mine.
I don’t believe in “pursuing fame for the sake of God”, because that seems to make God the secondary goal, as well as implying that you cannot bring glory to God without being famous. I’ve accepted and embraced that I can certainly do God’s work and reach many people with the gifts He’s given me without fame even being remotely apart of the equation. To say I’m trying to become famous for Him seems ridiculous, still seems more self-motivated than anyway, as well as self-controlling - trying to pursue my own way of life as opposed to letting God take the lead, like He’s supposed to.
To decide for myself “This is the way God is going to use me” and trying to get to a certain place before I let Him use me instead of letting myself be used for His will in the present and letting HIm take me where He deems fit - I don’t think that’s how it should be. But if I follow Him, use my gifts to His glory, and give my all to Him, and He ends up leading me to fame as a result - then I know how it absolutely must be used.
It’s not “try to become famous and use it for God” - it’s simply live my life always for God and follow Him wherever He leads me, whether that be general obscurity or worldwide renown. I just know that the amount of people who know who I am and what I’m doing does not measure my success. I know that even the amount of people I reach does not measure my success. It is simply letting God use me in all circumstances, letting Him use me to touch any life, knowing that heaven rejoices over even just one soul that comes to Jesus.
And if my art never reaches some place of wide recognition - then whatever. I’m far from fame, but there’s no doubt in my mind that God has already used my humor, films, and music to touch plenty of people. Fame won’t validate my creativity or purpose. God does that. And I’m just to give it all for His use, whether He wants to use it to reach ten people or ten million. Either way, His purpose is accomplished in the end, and that’s more than good enough for me.
But if He does want to use it to reach ten million - then I’m not opposed to that. No longer seeking that fate with all I got, but from an evangelistic prospective, there is a great advantage to having millions of people watching everything you do. And I do think that would be amazing. Much like with money, fame in itself isn’t a bad thing - it’s your attitude towards it, what you do with it that decides that. So if I am to ever be famous, I wouldn’t hate it. I don’t say that ironically - really, I’d just be fine with it.
But I feel part of me kind of starting to want fame again, in a much different way than I ever have before. It’s not a desire that’s consuming me, eating away at me - nothing that I’m obsessing over. Because it’s honestly not about my own recognition, attention or achievement, but rather it’s one moment playing in my head right now: At the grace of God being able to win an Oscar, stepping before all those people, those cameras, a nationwide audience and not thanking a laundry list of people, but rather straight up sharing the Gospel.
But if I never get that moment, it’s all good. I just pray that someone takes advantage of that moment in that way, and I will be more than satisfied to live out my life in the way God deems for me.
God had changed my heart so much that it’s incredible. It’s all on Him, that’s for sure, and I’m so grateful to Him for all that He has revealed to me, for continually sanctifying me - for saving me in the first place.
Lastly on fame - I pray that there will be more Tim Tebows in the world. In each industry, using the “spotlight” for Jesus. I pray that these Christians who are famous start using their fame to openly share Jesus. That they’ll realize that faith is not a private matter. If our faith is something we really cherish, really hold as important…if Jesus is to us what we say He is - why wouldn’t we want to share the wonderful love that has touched our lives so deeply to the point that we’re willing to call ourselves Christians? We wouldn’t have known Jesus if someone hadn’t told us - so whether we’re famous or not, I pray that we’re all led and convicted to share the amazing love of Christ with as many people as we can. Let’s not be selfish with it. Let’s not care what people think especially, because what people think certainly won’t matter once we’re off this Earth. In fact, we may take a look around and regret that we ever cared what people thought…
I think that’s what stops many “famous Christians” the most - fear of losing their fame, or even the opportunity to do what made them famous, by so openly endorsing and speaking about their faith. But I say that if I ever do become famous, I’m gonna speak about my faith until I do lose it. Then keep speaking about it even after that. If speaking about Christ is a surefire way to lose fame, then I’m gonna do all I can to lose it.
But really, that’s how it should be, regardless of fame. And that’s the ultimate lesson I’ve learned here - God can and will use us for His glory, no matter what the circumstance. Doesn’t matter if I’m famous or not - I’m still going all out on The Great Commission. There is always someone to be reached and influenced in our lives, after all.
Matthew 28:18-20
And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
Acts 1:8
“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”
And that’s the past four years of my life for you.
Friday, October 12, 2012
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Luke.
From February 14, 2008
The other day, I finished up reading the book of Luke (from the Holy Bible, in case you didn't know), and I figured I'd put here the verses that stuck out to me for anyone who may enjoy it.
What I really liked about this book is just being able to read the words spoken directly by Jesus. I especially love the parables - the metaphors, though simple, resound deeply. Then just reading all the things Jesus did in His life - impressive. I get inspired by reading this book to be as much like Him as possible.
And as I read this book, I realize how much I wish I could've been a disciple. I do consider myself a disciple of sorts due to my dedication to and thirst for Jesus, but to be able to have the opportunity to drop everything right there and follow Him would've been amazing. That's what I'm trying to do right now, but I'm not sure how. Well, I am sure how, just not sure how to get on that path, but God will surely show me the way.
Anyway, without further ado:
9:25 - "What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?"
That is exactly how I feel. He's pretty much speaking against selling out, but in a spiritual sense. But it can be applied to anything. It's important to be true to yourself and how you feel - don't give up that to get something less.
12:22 - "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes."
Just speaking out against superficiality and trivial concerns.
14:11 - "For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."
Something I need to remind self of at times.
14:13&14 - "But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."
15:7 - "I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who do not need to repent."
These two verses just remind me how important it is to reach out to people, rather it be those less fortunate or when it comes to witnessing. And how even though there are plenty of people going the right path, just getting one more to follow is amazing.
16:13 - "No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money."
This verse just reminds me of my little brother, haha. He's too concerned with money. A lot of people are. I couldn't careless.
16:15 - "You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of men, but God knows your hearts. What is highly valued among men is detestable in God's sight."
Seriously! The world's view on practically everything is so skewed. The things they embody are seriously overrated (coughoverconsumptionofalcoholcough and other things). People are so concerned about having a good time by definition of this world or being acceptable towards me, when only God matters.
17: 2-4 - "It would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin. So watch yourselves. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day and seven times comes back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him."
The first part of that - as Christian, we need to be a good example to others around us. So this verse helps remind me of that - to make sure I'm living my life right so I don't influence others to sin. The latter part - forgiveness. It's something I have struggled with in the past, and though I say I have forgiven everyone now, sometimes I don't think I necessarily act like it. So I like to be reminded that I should forgive everyone.
18:17 - "I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
A characteristic of a child, first off, is that they don't feel the need to question every single little thing. Nitpicky details don't matter - just Jesus is our Savior, trust God, and all things will be good.
18:29 - "'I tell you the truth,' Jesus said to them, 'no one who has left home or wife or brothers or parents or children for the sake of the kingdom of God will fail to receive many times as much in this age and, in the age to come, eternal life.'"
Just encourages me to sacrifice it all for His sake.
22:49-51 - "When Jesus' followers saw what was going to happen, they said, 'Lord, should we strike with our swords?' And one of them struck the servant of the high priest, cutting off his right ear. But Jesus answered, 'No more of this!' And he touched the man's ear and healed him."
See, that's just amazing to me. These men were coming to arrest Jesus for no good reason and eventually kill Him, yet He still heals the guy who gets his ear chopped off. This man essentially deserves to lose an ear, but Jesus still helps Him out.
23:34 - "Jesus said, 'Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.'"
Once again, forgiveness. Despite it all, Jesus was willing to forgive those who were crucifying Him. So I should be willing to forgive.
So yeah, that's all. Luke is now definitely one of my favorite books, along with Acts, Romans, and I Peter. I practically inhaled Luke - I couldn't get enough. If you haven't read it already, I suggest you do.
Anyway, yeah, that's it.
The other day, I finished up reading the book of Luke (from the Holy Bible, in case you didn't know), and I figured I'd put here the verses that stuck out to me for anyone who may enjoy it.
What I really liked about this book is just being able to read the words spoken directly by Jesus. I especially love the parables - the metaphors, though simple, resound deeply. Then just reading all the things Jesus did in His life - impressive. I get inspired by reading this book to be as much like Him as possible.
And as I read this book, I realize how much I wish I could've been a disciple. I do consider myself a disciple of sorts due to my dedication to and thirst for Jesus, but to be able to have the opportunity to drop everything right there and follow Him would've been amazing. That's what I'm trying to do right now, but I'm not sure how. Well, I am sure how, just not sure how to get on that path, but God will surely show me the way.
Anyway, without further ado:
9:25 - "What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?"
That is exactly how I feel. He's pretty much speaking against selling out, but in a spiritual sense. But it can be applied to anything. It's important to be true to yourself and how you feel - don't give up that to get something less.
12:22 - "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes."
Just speaking out against superficiality and trivial concerns.
14:11 - "For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."
Something I need to remind self of at times.
14:13&14 - "But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."
15:7 - "I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who do not need to repent."
These two verses just remind me how important it is to reach out to people, rather it be those less fortunate or when it comes to witnessing. And how even though there are plenty of people going the right path, just getting one more to follow is amazing.
16:13 - "No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money."
This verse just reminds me of my little brother, haha. He's too concerned with money. A lot of people are. I couldn't careless.
16:15 - "You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of men, but God knows your hearts. What is highly valued among men is detestable in God's sight."
Seriously! The world's view on practically everything is so skewed. The things they embody are seriously overrated (coughoverconsumptionofalcoholcough and other things). People are so concerned about having a good time by definition of this world or being acceptable towards me, when only God matters.
17: 2-4 - "It would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin. So watch yourselves. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day and seven times comes back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him."
The first part of that - as Christian, we need to be a good example to others around us. So this verse helps remind me of that - to make sure I'm living my life right so I don't influence others to sin. The latter part - forgiveness. It's something I have struggled with in the past, and though I say I have forgiven everyone now, sometimes I don't think I necessarily act like it. So I like to be reminded that I should forgive everyone.
18:17 - "I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
A characteristic of a child, first off, is that they don't feel the need to question every single little thing. Nitpicky details don't matter - just Jesus is our Savior, trust God, and all things will be good.
18:29 - "'I tell you the truth,' Jesus said to them, 'no one who has left home or wife or brothers or parents or children for the sake of the kingdom of God will fail to receive many times as much in this age and, in the age to come, eternal life.'"
Just encourages me to sacrifice it all for His sake.
22:49-51 - "When Jesus' followers saw what was going to happen, they said, 'Lord, should we strike with our swords?' And one of them struck the servant of the high priest, cutting off his right ear. But Jesus answered, 'No more of this!' And he touched the man's ear and healed him."
See, that's just amazing to me. These men were coming to arrest Jesus for no good reason and eventually kill Him, yet He still heals the guy who gets his ear chopped off. This man essentially deserves to lose an ear, but Jesus still helps Him out.
23:34 - "Jesus said, 'Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.'"
Once again, forgiveness. Despite it all, Jesus was willing to forgive those who were crucifying Him. So I should be willing to forgive.
So yeah, that's all. Luke is now definitely one of my favorite books, along with Acts, Romans, and I Peter. I practically inhaled Luke - I couldn't get enough. If you haven't read it already, I suggest you do.
Anyway, yeah, that's it.
The Easter Bunny Scares Me.
From March 23, 2008
The image of Jesus on the cross sends chills down my spine.
It's one of those things that tears apart my mind in conflict. To be able to witness the sacrifice that saved my soul seems like it would be amazing. But to see the One who loves me the most - a love that no one can even begin to fathom - writhing in agony over someone as insignificant as me...
I know I don't deserve it. That sort of love. The grace that says that despite of all my imperfections and my inherent sinfulness that I can enjoy eternal life and salvation. Not a single thing that God has given me do I deserve.
Yet here I am, blessed beyond all belief - allowed so many things because of a sacrifice that I will never be able to fully grasp. I don't understand - all of that for an opportunity that so many people won't even take advantage of?
I believe Easter's true meaning is even more forgotten than Christmas'. With how commercialized that holiday has sadly become, at least we are constantly presented with spiritual carols and images of the nativity scene. But come Easter time, all I see are stupid multi-colored eggs and ridiculously terrifying personified bunnies, when rabbits can't even lay eggs.
What I don't see enough is the image of an empty tomb - the image that truly separates Jesus from just some prophet who was martyred. Because even though others have been resurrected from the dead (a prime example would be Lazarus), this was only a brief occurrence, for they eventually died permanently. Jesus, however, died, rose again, and then still living, ascended into the heavens.
It's a symbolism of sorts. Just like Jesus was risen from the dead, we are risen from this dead life of sin once we accept Him as our Savior. Jesus mastering death by rising from it shows the true defeat of sin. The Bible often ties the concept of death to that of sin. Thus, Jesus rising from death mirrors that of us rising from sin, and the ability to do that, because of His sacrifice.
I could not possibly imagine having to go through the suffering and pain that Jesus Christ had to, just for a group of violently imperfect creatures who aren't even grateful half of the time for all the amazingness that surrounds them. We don't deserve it. Not in the least bit.
But I am eternally grateful for that blood shed. For the resurrection that occurred afterwards. For the fact that my sins are paid in full and the only thing I had to do was accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior and try my very hardest to live a life which glorifies Him (which also benefits me in the long run more than a sinful lifestyle would, anyway).
It's the thing that makes me rest easy at night. Not the pretty basket full of jelly bean that my mother prepared for me. Not the overflow of pinks and yellows and other bright hues plastered everywhere. Not some huge, scary bunny seated in the middle of the mall, allowing children to sit on its lap (how the heck was a rabbit derived as the "mascot" for the secular definition of Easter, anyway)?
But the blood of Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.
It's inspirational, you know? If He could go through such suffering for my salvation, than it should be no problem for me to give myself up as a living sacrifice for Him, despite whatever suffering and hardship that may result from it. I owe Him my soul, so I give Him my life.
Romans 3:22-24
"This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus."
Romans 7:24
"What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
Romans 5:6-11
"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since we have now been justified by His blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through Him! For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled through the death of His Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through His life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation."
Romans 6:6-7
"For we know that our old self was crucified with Him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin - because anyone who has died has been freed from sin. Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with Him. For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, He cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over Him. The death He died, He died to since once for all; but the life He lives, He lives to God."
Romans 6:18
"You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness."
1 Corinthians 15:12
"But if it is preached that Christ has been raised from the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? If there is no resurrections of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith. More than that, we are then found to be false witnesses about God, for we have testified about God that He raised Christ from the dead. But He did not raise Him if in fact the dead are not raised. For if the dead are not raised, then Christ has not been raised either. And if Christ had not been raised, your faith is futile; you are still in your sins."
Ephesians 2:1-5
"As for you, you were dead in your transgression and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions - it is by grace you have been saved."
There are so many more verses I can reference, man. The Bible is full of all this amazing stuff.
God is truly amazing and loving. So today I implore you to forget about that creepy Easter Bunny, but rather dwell deeply on and celebrate the ultimate sacrifice - that of Jesus Christ for our souls to be saved from sin so that we can have eternal life.
The image of Jesus on the cross sends chills down my spine.
It's one of those things that tears apart my mind in conflict. To be able to witness the sacrifice that saved my soul seems like it would be amazing. But to see the One who loves me the most - a love that no one can even begin to fathom - writhing in agony over someone as insignificant as me...
I know I don't deserve it. That sort of love. The grace that says that despite of all my imperfections and my inherent sinfulness that I can enjoy eternal life and salvation. Not a single thing that God has given me do I deserve.
Yet here I am, blessed beyond all belief - allowed so many things because of a sacrifice that I will never be able to fully grasp. I don't understand - all of that for an opportunity that so many people won't even take advantage of?
I believe Easter's true meaning is even more forgotten than Christmas'. With how commercialized that holiday has sadly become, at least we are constantly presented with spiritual carols and images of the nativity scene. But come Easter time, all I see are stupid multi-colored eggs and ridiculously terrifying personified bunnies, when rabbits can't even lay eggs.
What I don't see enough is the image of an empty tomb - the image that truly separates Jesus from just some prophet who was martyred. Because even though others have been resurrected from the dead (a prime example would be Lazarus), this was only a brief occurrence, for they eventually died permanently. Jesus, however, died, rose again, and then still living, ascended into the heavens.
It's a symbolism of sorts. Just like Jesus was risen from the dead, we are risen from this dead life of sin once we accept Him as our Savior. Jesus mastering death by rising from it shows the true defeat of sin. The Bible often ties the concept of death to that of sin. Thus, Jesus rising from death mirrors that of us rising from sin, and the ability to do that, because of His sacrifice.
I could not possibly imagine having to go through the suffering and pain that Jesus Christ had to, just for a group of violently imperfect creatures who aren't even grateful half of the time for all the amazingness that surrounds them. We don't deserve it. Not in the least bit.
But I am eternally grateful for that blood shed. For the resurrection that occurred afterwards. For the fact that my sins are paid in full and the only thing I had to do was accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior and try my very hardest to live a life which glorifies Him (which also benefits me in the long run more than a sinful lifestyle would, anyway).
It's the thing that makes me rest easy at night. Not the pretty basket full of jelly bean that my mother prepared for me. Not the overflow of pinks and yellows and other bright hues plastered everywhere. Not some huge, scary bunny seated in the middle of the mall, allowing children to sit on its lap (how the heck was a rabbit derived as the "mascot" for the secular definition of Easter, anyway)?
But the blood of Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.
It's inspirational, you know? If He could go through such suffering for my salvation, than it should be no problem for me to give myself up as a living sacrifice for Him, despite whatever suffering and hardship that may result from it. I owe Him my soul, so I give Him my life.
Romans 3:22-24
"This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus."
Romans 7:24
"What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
Romans 5:6-11
"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since we have now been justified by His blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through Him! For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled through the death of His Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through His life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation."
Romans 6:6-7
"For we know that our old self was crucified with Him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin - because anyone who has died has been freed from sin. Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with Him. For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, He cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over Him. The death He died, He died to since once for all; but the life He lives, He lives to God."
Romans 6:18
"You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness."
1 Corinthians 15:12
"But if it is preached that Christ has been raised from the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? If there is no resurrections of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith. More than that, we are then found to be false witnesses about God, for we have testified about God that He raised Christ from the dead. But He did not raise Him if in fact the dead are not raised. For if the dead are not raised, then Christ has not been raised either. And if Christ had not been raised, your faith is futile; you are still in your sins."
Ephesians 2:1-5
"As for you, you were dead in your transgression and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions - it is by grace you have been saved."
There are so many more verses I can reference, man. The Bible is full of all this amazing stuff.
God is truly amazing and loving. So today I implore you to forget about that creepy Easter Bunny, but rather dwell deeply on and celebrate the ultimate sacrifice - that of Jesus Christ for our souls to be saved from sin so that we can have eternal life.
Amor.
From March 11, 2008
I Corinthians 13:4-8
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keep no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails..."
Romans 12: 9-17
"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil."
Romans 13:9-10
"The commandments, 'Do not commit adultery,' 'Do not murder,' 'Do not steal,' 'Do not covet,' and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law."
I Peter 4:8-10
"Above all else, love deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithful administering God's grace in its various form."
I Timothy 1:5
"The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith."
Ephesians 5:1-2
"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."
Can we remove all romantic connotations from the word for just a few moments? Love is pure, but the concept is tainted by the secular definitions. In all these verses, the "love" is not complimented by words such as "marriage", but rather the idea of reaching out to others, no matter who they may be.
Love is a word that is often thrown around quite meaninglessly, most likely because most people do not truly understand what love truly is. Now I do not claim to be an expert, but I would consider Paul one. And his description of love, as seen in I Corinthians covers it all.
It's the end of that segment that touches me the most. "Love never fails." I think it's complete crap when people utter the words, "I just don't love him/her anymore." If that's the case, then it obviously wasn't love to begin with. The things of the world are fickle and uncertain, but love is of God, and if there is one certain in life, than it is Him. If anyone's experiences with love goes against what He has said in anyway, then I am confident to say that it was not quite love.
"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demon, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is Christ in Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39)
Now that's love.
Of course, we are repeatedly told to love our neighbors, but I'm sure we all question whether or not it's possible to have such a sincere love for everyone, including people we haven't meant. Obviously, there must be different levels of love, defined by the amount of fervor behind it, but the same principle still remains. Though not as invested in the homeless man I pass on the street daily as I am with my mother, I am still expected to reach out to him just the same.
But I believe to fulfill the criteria of love as stated above from the Bible, certain prerequisites in the relationship aren't needed, especially since we are not talking of "romantic" love at this moment. Thus I am constantly inspired to reach out in the best way I can to everyone who may need it. It's a thought that has been swimming around in my mind a lot for the past weeks, but I feel like I haven't exactly acted on it. No, I do not blatantly shun people, but there is always more than I can be doing to show love.
I Peter 4:8-10 especially speaks to me on this matter. Verse 8 has always been one of my favorite verses, but recently I've noted the following verses. It is not a coincidence that Peter speaks of hospitality right after he mentions love. So I want to be available to anyone who may need me, may it be in the simplest way or in the most complex way. I realize how easy it is to show love and how the slightest gesture can mean a lot to a person.
"Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithful administering God's grace in its various form."
Another thing that I am now becoming more focused on. I've been quite aware of my talents for some time now, mostly because compliments on them have been shoved down my throat since I was about seven. But it's come to the point that I realize that I shouldn't be using my gifts for my own joy, but for the joy of the Lord and of others. Especially in my case, when I have talents that specifically can be used to impact others (creativity, writing, humor). And without even meaning to, I've seen lately that these abilities have already been used by God to touch the lives of others, but I am not willing to just stop there. I want to take it to another level.
I just think it's very important to be a beacon of the love of the Lord. More important than myself, after all, is others.
Love is a simple concept with a powerful results. It can change moments, lives, the world. It's something we all need to be more conscience. Instead of automatically equivocating this concept to romance, we need to broaden our definitions to encompass what God truly means it as.
And this is regard to not just our friend and family, but enemies and strangers as well.
Let it be known that I am working on a blank state here. Despite lack of compatibilities or events that may have occurred in the past, I am willing to love and I'm going to love. And I think I've lost the central point of this note long ago.
But then again, isn't the central point love? 'Cause unlike most things, love never fails.
I love you all.
I Corinthians 13:4-8
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keep no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails..."
Romans 12: 9-17
"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil."
Romans 13:9-10
"The commandments, 'Do not commit adultery,' 'Do not murder,' 'Do not steal,' 'Do not covet,' and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law."
I Peter 4:8-10
"Above all else, love deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithful administering God's grace in its various form."
I Timothy 1:5
"The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith."
Ephesians 5:1-2
"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."
Can we remove all romantic connotations from the word for just a few moments? Love is pure, but the concept is tainted by the secular definitions. In all these verses, the "love" is not complimented by words such as "marriage", but rather the idea of reaching out to others, no matter who they may be.
Love is a word that is often thrown around quite meaninglessly, most likely because most people do not truly understand what love truly is. Now I do not claim to be an expert, but I would consider Paul one. And his description of love, as seen in I Corinthians covers it all.
It's the end of that segment that touches me the most. "Love never fails." I think it's complete crap when people utter the words, "I just don't love him/her anymore." If that's the case, then it obviously wasn't love to begin with. The things of the world are fickle and uncertain, but love is of God, and if there is one certain in life, than it is Him. If anyone's experiences with love goes against what He has said in anyway, then I am confident to say that it was not quite love.
"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demon, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is Christ in Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39)
Now that's love.
Of course, we are repeatedly told to love our neighbors, but I'm sure we all question whether or not it's possible to have such a sincere love for everyone, including people we haven't meant. Obviously, there must be different levels of love, defined by the amount of fervor behind it, but the same principle still remains. Though not as invested in the homeless man I pass on the street daily as I am with my mother, I am still expected to reach out to him just the same.
But I believe to fulfill the criteria of love as stated above from the Bible, certain prerequisites in the relationship aren't needed, especially since we are not talking of "romantic" love at this moment. Thus I am constantly inspired to reach out in the best way I can to everyone who may need it. It's a thought that has been swimming around in my mind a lot for the past weeks, but I feel like I haven't exactly acted on it. No, I do not blatantly shun people, but there is always more than I can be doing to show love.
I Peter 4:8-10 especially speaks to me on this matter. Verse 8 has always been one of my favorite verses, but recently I've noted the following verses. It is not a coincidence that Peter speaks of hospitality right after he mentions love. So I want to be available to anyone who may need me, may it be in the simplest way or in the most complex way. I realize how easy it is to show love and how the slightest gesture can mean a lot to a person.
"Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithful administering God's grace in its various form."
Another thing that I am now becoming more focused on. I've been quite aware of my talents for some time now, mostly because compliments on them have been shoved down my throat since I was about seven. But it's come to the point that I realize that I shouldn't be using my gifts for my own joy, but for the joy of the Lord and of others. Especially in my case, when I have talents that specifically can be used to impact others (creativity, writing, humor). And without even meaning to, I've seen lately that these abilities have already been used by God to touch the lives of others, but I am not willing to just stop there. I want to take it to another level.
I just think it's very important to be a beacon of the love of the Lord. More important than myself, after all, is others.
Love is a simple concept with a powerful results. It can change moments, lives, the world. It's something we all need to be more conscience. Instead of automatically equivocating this concept to romance, we need to broaden our definitions to encompass what God truly means it as.
And this is regard to not just our friend and family, but enemies and strangers as well.
Let it be known that I am working on a blank state here. Despite lack of compatibilities or events that may have occurred in the past, I am willing to love and I'm going to love. And I think I've lost the central point of this note long ago.
But then again, isn't the central point love? 'Cause unlike most things, love never fails.
I love you all.
Trust the Lord.
From March 24, 2008
Ecclesiastes 11:1
"Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again."
I honestly had no idea what that meant. Fortunately, my pre-teen oriented Bible that I've had for nearly four years but won't part with because I have too many things underlined (I'll get a new one once I've read through this one completely), offers guidance in regards to puzzling phrases like this.
It's just Bible time slang. To cast your bread upon the waters meant to "be adventurous and risk everything you had". Well, it still means that, but most people don't use that sort of terminology these days.
So what that verse is getting at, according to this little blurb, is that "God would honor that risk and take care of all your needs, including your food." I'm assuming the food bit was thrown in there because of the "bread", but beyond the point.
I smiled widely after I read that verse. I love these little reminders thrown in that I come across, reassuring me that I'm doing the right thing.
Then scanning through Proverbs a bit later on:
Proverbs 16:3
"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."
I mean, it makes sense. He really is looking out for us. So why are we so content with whatever and same ol'? Why do we stop ourselves from doing something REAL, something for others, something for God because we supposedly don't have the resources? Don't you know that your God will take care of every single one of your needs if you live your life righteously?
It's more of a reminder to myself than anything. And a justification.
I really need to do something more than this in my life because my dissatisfaction is forever surmounting.
However, I'm joyful and happy, which is a grand feeling. I found myself practically skipping down the streets of New York this evening, full and genuine smile plastered on my face. And I used to question such feelings - try to figure out what could possibly be the cause of it - but I have since abandoned those efforts. It's God, and I am quite fine leaving it at that.
For everything, I am quite fine leaving it at that.
But if you think I can surrender myself to monotony, wasted potential, and general discontent for who knows how long, then you are dreadfully mistaken. It's common knowledge that the longer you tolerate an annoyance, the harder it is to eventually escape it. So pretty much, it's now or never.
I've been spouting this risk-taking, do what YOU feel regardless of society or anyone else, just go for it, live life to it's fullest potential philosophies for as long as I've had the ability to use higher-end thinking. It's about time I actually lived it.
And know that I can risk it all, but as long as my intentions are good and my heart is set on God, then I will come out the winner in the end.
Ecclesiastes 11:1
"Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again."
I honestly had no idea what that meant. Fortunately, my pre-teen oriented Bible that I've had for nearly four years but won't part with because I have too many things underlined (I'll get a new one once I've read through this one completely), offers guidance in regards to puzzling phrases like this.
It's just Bible time slang. To cast your bread upon the waters meant to "be adventurous and risk everything you had". Well, it still means that, but most people don't use that sort of terminology these days.
So what that verse is getting at, according to this little blurb, is that "God would honor that risk and take care of all your needs, including your food." I'm assuming the food bit was thrown in there because of the "bread", but beyond the point.
I smiled widely after I read that verse. I love these little reminders thrown in that I come across, reassuring me that I'm doing the right thing.
Then scanning through Proverbs a bit later on:
Proverbs 16:3
"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."
I mean, it makes sense. He really is looking out for us. So why are we so content with whatever and same ol'? Why do we stop ourselves from doing something REAL, something for others, something for God because we supposedly don't have the resources? Don't you know that your God will take care of every single one of your needs if you live your life righteously?
It's more of a reminder to myself than anything. And a justification.
I really need to do something more than this in my life because my dissatisfaction is forever surmounting.
However, I'm joyful and happy, which is a grand feeling. I found myself practically skipping down the streets of New York this evening, full and genuine smile plastered on my face. And I used to question such feelings - try to figure out what could possibly be the cause of it - but I have since abandoned those efforts. It's God, and I am quite fine leaving it at that.
For everything, I am quite fine leaving it at that.
But if you think I can surrender myself to monotony, wasted potential, and general discontent for who knows how long, then you are dreadfully mistaken. It's common knowledge that the longer you tolerate an annoyance, the harder it is to eventually escape it. So pretty much, it's now or never.
I've been spouting this risk-taking, do what YOU feel regardless of society or anyone else, just go for it, live life to it's fullest potential philosophies for as long as I've had the ability to use higher-end thinking. It's about time I actually lived it.
And know that I can risk it all, but as long as my intentions are good and my heart is set on God, then I will come out the winner in the end.
There is no Chance. Just God.
From April 16, 2008
With less than three weeks to go, I might as well start to begin the reflection process.
I never planned to be apart of Campus Crusade for Christ. I knew I wanted to be sure that my faith wouldn't take a lapse as I entered college, but to be honest, a Christian fellowship wasn't the forefront of my mind, never really being apart of one before. I just wanted to meet a few Christian people and attend a church, and I figured I'd be golden.
So during the the otherwise pointless occasion known as "Welcome Week", I found myself at the Catholic Center, ironically for "Protestant Worship Night." There were more people there than expected - after all, I figured this was a school where half of the students were Jewish and the other half were agonistical atheist, vaguely spiritual, but not really, folks. Not much room for Christians.
Tisch School of the Arts is strange. That much I knew before I came to NYU, solely because of the title "school of the arts." Figures that during our orientation, they'd assign us something before classes actually started, just to inconvenience a poor little, relatively shy girl from North Carolina who hadn't the slightest clue how to navigate properly the subway systems. I could hardly get to Kimmel effectively.
Nonetheless, I was told that before my first Writing the Essay class, I had to travel to the Museum of Modern Art to check out the Richard Serra exhibit. Where was this so-called "MoMa?" I didn't know, but I did know that it was free on Fridays, and that I had no one to accompany me.
Back to Protestant Worship Night, there was a post-gathering involving snacks and plenty of flyers after the worshipping. Things for tons of Christian groups and clubs and all sorts of fun, spiritual things. And of course, the typical list of questions. "Name? Where you from? Where you living? What's your major?"
"Chanelle. Yes, like 'No. 5'. No, it's not spelled the same. North Carolina. Yes, it's a big difference. Brittany. Film and Television."
It was the last answer that got a "Transform" flyer stuck in my hands, a Christian group focused on the arts. It was the content of that flyer that opened my eyes a bit. That Friday, they were going to MoMa! Problem solved.
That night, I ended up at Upstein (and found out that people up North were deprived of the wonder of Chick-Fil-A) with a bunch of cool cats from ... whoa, I definitely totally went blank on the name. (EDIT:Intervarsity is the name) But they were nice, and I figured, if I were to join a fellowship on campus, that was probably the one I'd end up at.
Friday found me dazed and in front of Kimmel, looking for the group that would lead me to the completion of my pointless Tisch assignment. It was a bit after the designated meeting time, and I was sure that I was soon going to be forced to turn back, empty-handed and forced to b.s. an essay (something high school had given me plenty of practice at). But fortunately, I spotted a blob roaming the area, made up of a few people I'd recognized from the night before.
It's funny looking back on that moment, thinking of the people I was introduced to who I knew nothing about in those moments. Strangers. People that I honestly didn't expect to come into much contact with after I was done viewing Richard Serra.
We were led to the subway station - everybody pulled out their metrocard and went right through. I, however, was a bit loss. I didn't own one of these "metro cards", yet everybody else did? Really?
My confusion must've been made apparent on my incredibly attractive, yet distinctly innocent face (hahaha), because Nick (though I think I only knew him back then as 'Tall white guy who is probably a couple of years older than me') came "to the rescue" and instructed me in the art of purchasing a metrocard. I put $20 on it, and it's still the same baby I use to this day. But more on him and our adventures through New York later, ha. In all seriousness, I will at a later time write a note about my metrocard.
And it was off to the MoMa. Being the painfully socially awkward in the face of strangers child that I was, I broke away from the group after we went through the incredibly long line and had purchased our free tickets (talk about your contradictions). I was on a mission - find Richard Serra, be amazed, then go back to Brittany.
Nothing went as planned. Well, I did find Richard Serra (his work, though, not the actual sculptor), had my interests vaguely aroused, but nothing that had me awestruck, since I wasn't exactly a fan of large pieces of metal that looked like they'd had the Force used on them. And I never ended up back at Brittany, but rather ended up living at the museum for my entire freshman year.
I'll stop being ridiculous now.
The end of my museum journey landed me back with these Christian peoples before the designated meeting time. I remember Josh and Michele, at least, as I sat awkwardly with them, listening in on their conversation, idly checking my phone and looking around, quite relieved that I had gotten the first part of my assignment done. We headed to the lobby to wait for the others.
Then I was engaged in bits and pieces of conversation, though I was mentally cursing myself at how inept I was at it. I recall Michele asking me for my phone number, then asking if I was attending the picnic in Central Park the next day.
Now, I knew nothing about a picnic. I was only at the MoMa because a little flyer for TransForm had told me. But I should've known then and before that this wasn't just a TransForm event. I had now entered the world of Campus Crusade for Christ - whatever the heck that was.
Figuring that Christian friends and a life outside of the fourteenth floor of Brittany Hall couldn't possibly hurt me (and not to mention, a chance to go to Central Park!), I told Michele, "I think I will." It's odd how sometimes, I remember things in such detail. What's not odd is that I just skipped class. Oops?
After the museum escapade, I found myself in the midst of these people, eating at this place called Cosi. Naturally, I was relatively silent. I can't remember if I got much badgering about it - that's what usually happens, so I'm sure at least once the question was posed "Why aren't you really talking?" Oh, that's a loaded question.
But I definitely didn't mind, though, sitting, eating, and listening to these people talk. They seemed interesting. They were mostly older, they were Christians, and they were nice people.
Then came the first taste of what the rest of my semester would be like. Riding on the subway back downtown, I was expecting to just head back to my dorm, mingle, call my mom to tell her about my adventures, then go to bed. Instead, I got a social life when Michele and Andrea invited me to Andrea's dorm to watch the bootleg version of Hairspray.
I think I was vaguely impressed with myself. Here I was, not even a week after my parents had kicked me to the curb of 55 East Tenth Street, hanging out at a different dorm with people older than me. I was figuratively brushing off my shoulders. Just a bit over a month before, I had turned eighteen. Now, I was a woman!
No, honestly, nothing THAT dramatic was going through my head. But I was still a bit flying high. Even if I hardly said a word during that entire night, I was still already broadening my social circle. I didn't even care that I was watching a bootleg movie, something I generally frown upon, seeing how I'm a film major (ha). I had older friends! Well, acquaintances. Well, nice people who'd invite the awkward freshman to hang out with them.
After SafeRide dropped me off in front of my dorm building that night, a bit after 12 (something else I felt proud of at the time. Big ol' Chanelle practically a veteran already, hanging out in New York City past midnight, something I hardly even got to do in High Point), I decided that I would check out this picnic the next day. It was something I honestly had decided at Cosi. These Campus Crusaders were interesting people.
In reflection, I find life lessons that had always been there, but am now just truly realizing the meaning of. Such as, when you seek God, things go your way. It's something I've known for awhile, rediscovered back then, but I realize now that it was something that was even apparent back then, though I'm not sure if I knew it. I went to Protestant Worship Night to find a way to keep strong in my faith as I entered college, and God threw in a bonus of giving me away to complete an assignment that had already been stressing me out. He's just amazing like that.
Those days started the progression of the my year that led me to the point that I am now. It's amazing, because of course it seemed like nothing at the time, but if I hadn't have gone to that one meeting, the course of my life of NYU could've been completely different. I wasn't able to go to the Club Fair because I believe it was on a Thursday, when I had my all-day class, so I would not have found out about Cru that way. Even if I had still gone to the Protestant Worship night, if I hadn't have gone to the MoMa that Friday, I surely wouldn't have ended up at Cru, but probably that campus fellowship whose name I still can't remember, and I have no idea why not. Okay, I'm looking back on my old wall posts right now, because I know a guy from the fellowship left me one, inviting me to a meeting. Or maybe it was a message...?
INTERVARSITY! hahaha That's the fellowship. Goodness. Anyway, yeah, I probably would've ended up at Intervarsity, thus leading a completely different existence than I am now.
Moral of the story - A Tisch assignment led to...the formation of BAM?
So pretty much, anybody who has been apart of Club Chanelle has Richard Serra and Writing the Essay to thank for that. Who would've knew? haaaaaaa
With less than three weeks to go, I might as well start to begin the reflection process.
I never planned to be apart of Campus Crusade for Christ. I knew I wanted to be sure that my faith wouldn't take a lapse as I entered college, but to be honest, a Christian fellowship wasn't the forefront of my mind, never really being apart of one before. I just wanted to meet a few Christian people and attend a church, and I figured I'd be golden.
So during the the otherwise pointless occasion known as "Welcome Week", I found myself at the Catholic Center, ironically for "Protestant Worship Night." There were more people there than expected - after all, I figured this was a school where half of the students were Jewish and the other half were agonistical atheist, vaguely spiritual, but not really, folks. Not much room for Christians.
Tisch School of the Arts is strange. That much I knew before I came to NYU, solely because of the title "school of the arts." Figures that during our orientation, they'd assign us something before classes actually started, just to inconvenience a poor little, relatively shy girl from North Carolina who hadn't the slightest clue how to navigate properly the subway systems. I could hardly get to Kimmel effectively.
Nonetheless, I was told that before my first Writing the Essay class, I had to travel to the Museum of Modern Art to check out the Richard Serra exhibit. Where was this so-called "MoMa?" I didn't know, but I did know that it was free on Fridays, and that I had no one to accompany me.
Back to Protestant Worship Night, there was a post-gathering involving snacks and plenty of flyers after the worshipping. Things for tons of Christian groups and clubs and all sorts of fun, spiritual things. And of course, the typical list of questions. "Name? Where you from? Where you living? What's your major?"
"Chanelle. Yes, like 'No. 5'. No, it's not spelled the same. North Carolina. Yes, it's a big difference. Brittany. Film and Television."
It was the last answer that got a "Transform" flyer stuck in my hands, a Christian group focused on the arts. It was the content of that flyer that opened my eyes a bit. That Friday, they were going to MoMa! Problem solved.
That night, I ended up at Upstein (and found out that people up North were deprived of the wonder of Chick-Fil-A) with a bunch of cool cats from ... whoa, I definitely totally went blank on the name. (EDIT:Intervarsity is the name) But they were nice, and I figured, if I were to join a fellowship on campus, that was probably the one I'd end up at.
Friday found me dazed and in front of Kimmel, looking for the group that would lead me to the completion of my pointless Tisch assignment. It was a bit after the designated meeting time, and I was sure that I was soon going to be forced to turn back, empty-handed and forced to b.s. an essay (something high school had given me plenty of practice at). But fortunately, I spotted a blob roaming the area, made up of a few people I'd recognized from the night before.
It's funny looking back on that moment, thinking of the people I was introduced to who I knew nothing about in those moments. Strangers. People that I honestly didn't expect to come into much contact with after I was done viewing Richard Serra.
We were led to the subway station - everybody pulled out their metrocard and went right through. I, however, was a bit loss. I didn't own one of these "metro cards", yet everybody else did? Really?
My confusion must've been made apparent on my incredibly attractive, yet distinctly innocent face (hahaha), because Nick (though I think I only knew him back then as 'Tall white guy who is probably a couple of years older than me') came "to the rescue" and instructed me in the art of purchasing a metrocard. I put $20 on it, and it's still the same baby I use to this day. But more on him and our adventures through New York later, ha. In all seriousness, I will at a later time write a note about my metrocard.
And it was off to the MoMa. Being the painfully socially awkward in the face of strangers child that I was, I broke away from the group after we went through the incredibly long line and had purchased our free tickets (talk about your contradictions). I was on a mission - find Richard Serra, be amazed, then go back to Brittany.
Nothing went as planned. Well, I did find Richard Serra (his work, though, not the actual sculptor), had my interests vaguely aroused, but nothing that had me awestruck, since I wasn't exactly a fan of large pieces of metal that looked like they'd had the Force used on them. And I never ended up back at Brittany, but rather ended up living at the museum for my entire freshman year.
I'll stop being ridiculous now.
The end of my museum journey landed me back with these Christian peoples before the designated meeting time. I remember Josh and Michele, at least, as I sat awkwardly with them, listening in on their conversation, idly checking my phone and looking around, quite relieved that I had gotten the first part of my assignment done. We headed to the lobby to wait for the others.
Then I was engaged in bits and pieces of conversation, though I was mentally cursing myself at how inept I was at it. I recall Michele asking me for my phone number, then asking if I was attending the picnic in Central Park the next day.
Now, I knew nothing about a picnic. I was only at the MoMa because a little flyer for TransForm had told me. But I should've known then and before that this wasn't just a TransForm event. I had now entered the world of Campus Crusade for Christ - whatever the heck that was.
Figuring that Christian friends and a life outside of the fourteenth floor of Brittany Hall couldn't possibly hurt me (and not to mention, a chance to go to Central Park!), I told Michele, "I think I will." It's odd how sometimes, I remember things in such detail. What's not odd is that I just skipped class. Oops?
After the museum escapade, I found myself in the midst of these people, eating at this place called Cosi. Naturally, I was relatively silent. I can't remember if I got much badgering about it - that's what usually happens, so I'm sure at least once the question was posed "Why aren't you really talking?" Oh, that's a loaded question.
But I definitely didn't mind, though, sitting, eating, and listening to these people talk. They seemed interesting. They were mostly older, they were Christians, and they were nice people.
Then came the first taste of what the rest of my semester would be like. Riding on the subway back downtown, I was expecting to just head back to my dorm, mingle, call my mom to tell her about my adventures, then go to bed. Instead, I got a social life when Michele and Andrea invited me to Andrea's dorm to watch the bootleg version of Hairspray.
I think I was vaguely impressed with myself. Here I was, not even a week after my parents had kicked me to the curb of 55 East Tenth Street, hanging out at a different dorm with people older than me. I was figuratively brushing off my shoulders. Just a bit over a month before, I had turned eighteen. Now, I was a woman!
No, honestly, nothing THAT dramatic was going through my head. But I was still a bit flying high. Even if I hardly said a word during that entire night, I was still already broadening my social circle. I didn't even care that I was watching a bootleg movie, something I generally frown upon, seeing how I'm a film major (ha). I had older friends! Well, acquaintances. Well, nice people who'd invite the awkward freshman to hang out with them.
After SafeRide dropped me off in front of my dorm building that night, a bit after 12 (something else I felt proud of at the time. Big ol' Chanelle practically a veteran already, hanging out in New York City past midnight, something I hardly even got to do in High Point), I decided that I would check out this picnic the next day. It was something I honestly had decided at Cosi. These Campus Crusaders were interesting people.
In reflection, I find life lessons that had always been there, but am now just truly realizing the meaning of. Such as, when you seek God, things go your way. It's something I've known for awhile, rediscovered back then, but I realize now that it was something that was even apparent back then, though I'm not sure if I knew it. I went to Protestant Worship Night to find a way to keep strong in my faith as I entered college, and God threw in a bonus of giving me away to complete an assignment that had already been stressing me out. He's just amazing like that.
Those days started the progression of the my year that led me to the point that I am now. It's amazing, because of course it seemed like nothing at the time, but if I hadn't have gone to that one meeting, the course of my life of NYU could've been completely different. I wasn't able to go to the Club Fair because I believe it was on a Thursday, when I had my all-day class, so I would not have found out about Cru that way. Even if I had still gone to the Protestant Worship night, if I hadn't have gone to the MoMa that Friday, I surely wouldn't have ended up at Cru, but probably that campus fellowship whose name I still can't remember, and I have no idea why not. Okay, I'm looking back on my old wall posts right now, because I know a guy from the fellowship left me one, inviting me to a meeting. Or maybe it was a message...?
INTERVARSITY! hahaha That's the fellowship. Goodness. Anyway, yeah, I probably would've ended up at Intervarsity, thus leading a completely different existence than I am now.
Moral of the story - A Tisch assignment led to...the formation of BAM?
So pretty much, anybody who has been apart of Club Chanelle has Richard Serra and Writing the Essay to thank for that. Who would've knew? haaaaaaa
That's right.
From May 19, 2008
People so often leave God out of the question. In reference to those who claim to believe in God, yet ignore it. The fact that people don't even seem to realize it just makes it sadder. I almost wonder if it would be better if it was blatant.
Belief is a convenience for a lot of people, it seems. A reflex. Something that not a lot of thought is put into, but just because of the way one was raised or because they want to believe in something bigger, or just want to be safe. But is belief out of convenience really believing?
He's important, you know. God. For those who do believe - this isn't the note to attempt to convince those who don't. It's not enough to just believe. Because it's more than just that - it's a way of life.
I dunno. It's just, there's no reason to depend on worldy things, you know. I see a lot of that. There's God - He's more than enough.
People so often leave God out of the question. In reference to those who claim to believe in God, yet ignore it. The fact that people don't even seem to realize it just makes it sadder. I almost wonder if it would be better if it was blatant.
Belief is a convenience for a lot of people, it seems. A reflex. Something that not a lot of thought is put into, but just because of the way one was raised or because they want to believe in something bigger, or just want to be safe. But is belief out of convenience really believing?
He's important, you know. God. For those who do believe - this isn't the note to attempt to convince those who don't. It's not enough to just believe. Because it's more than just that - it's a way of life.
I dunno. It's just, there's no reason to depend on worldy things, you know. I see a lot of that. There's God - He's more than enough.
My Personal Relationship.
From September 7, 2008
I think what most people's problems with accepting Christianity lies in the fact that it is looked at in too scientific of a way and society influences their perception too much. There's an unfortunate emphasis of the "religion" aspect of it, which is a completely man-made term and has nothing to do with what I believe in. The so-called traditions and standards, morphed through the ages to conform to specific people, rather than hitting at the heart what Christianity really actually means - love.
People get caught up in the supposed "illogic" and "unintelligence" of a belief in God, stating that there is no proof - that it's just an impossibility. Which I find to be ridiculous, personally. I cannot look at the intricacies of this world and life, examine things I've been through, and believe that it is just coincidence and chance. That there is nothing greater behind it. That is just irrational to me.
It's not just blind faith for me, however. When others talk about religion, it is in such an impersonal way. Because religion is impersonal - I am not at all a believer in religion. What I have is a relationship, as real as anybody else's relationship with their father or a friend. It's something strong, personal, touching, and comforting - and in it lies something so undeniably real. Now, I'm not an irrational person, who gives into imaginary emotions and fabricated feelings. It is the times where I am not trying to feel God where I feel him most prevalently. I haven't always been as fervent in my beliefs as I am now, and there's a distinct difference when you allow God to be actively present in your life.
With that personal relationship with God, all the confines of "religion" disappear. All the problems of religion disappear. Hypocrisy and manipulations, insincerity - it all fades. I don't want to condemn, judge, act as if I am above anybody else - I simply want to love. Which should be on the forefront of all Christian's minds before all else. A love for our Lord and a love for all those around us.
Unfortunately, because love is not at the forefront it should be with a lot of people, the title of Christianity is tainted. People get a bad taste in their mouths at the mention - I don't blame them. When you see the way some Christians treat homosexuals, supposedly in the name of God, or goes around condemning people to hell - it's appalling. And of course those who live two separate lives - it doesn't show our Lord in a good light at all, which is a shame.
Beyond the misconceptions of what Christianity really is supposed to be, atheists do tend to have a problem with the actual image of God Himself, but I do believe that a lot of them derive their informations from the wrong sources. Or else, it's just simplified. There is a lot to the Bible than meets then eyes, that does require intricate study and a complete knowledge of the context.
The thing is, those set against being so against my faith spent more time studying the evidence against rather than the evidence for. It's bound to happen - just a subconscious bias. In order to create a thorough decision, both sides of the issue to need to be covered.
Now I'm somewhat distracted as I write this, so I'll probably leave more to another note. But I do want to point out "The Case for Christ", a book written by an atheist who sent out to disprove Christianity and ended up becoming a Christian himself. It's an intriguing concept, right?
But you come from an event like Prayer in the Square, when thousands of people are packed into a block at Times Square, praising and worshipping sincerely and passionately, and you can just feel a greater power at work. Something undeniable. I'm sure everybody who walked by - believer or not - felt something to. A mere myth able to compel so many people so consistently for so long. To change around so many lives. That's not some religion - that's God.
I think what most people's problems with accepting Christianity lies in the fact that it is looked at in too scientific of a way and society influences their perception too much. There's an unfortunate emphasis of the "religion" aspect of it, which is a completely man-made term and has nothing to do with what I believe in. The so-called traditions and standards, morphed through the ages to conform to specific people, rather than hitting at the heart what Christianity really actually means - love.
People get caught up in the supposed "illogic" and "unintelligence" of a belief in God, stating that there is no proof - that it's just an impossibility. Which I find to be ridiculous, personally. I cannot look at the intricacies of this world and life, examine things I've been through, and believe that it is just coincidence and chance. That there is nothing greater behind it. That is just irrational to me.
It's not just blind faith for me, however. When others talk about religion, it is in such an impersonal way. Because religion is impersonal - I am not at all a believer in religion. What I have is a relationship, as real as anybody else's relationship with their father or a friend. It's something strong, personal, touching, and comforting - and in it lies something so undeniably real. Now, I'm not an irrational person, who gives into imaginary emotions and fabricated feelings. It is the times where I am not trying to feel God where I feel him most prevalently. I haven't always been as fervent in my beliefs as I am now, and there's a distinct difference when you allow God to be actively present in your life.
With that personal relationship with God, all the confines of "religion" disappear. All the problems of religion disappear. Hypocrisy and manipulations, insincerity - it all fades. I don't want to condemn, judge, act as if I am above anybody else - I simply want to love. Which should be on the forefront of all Christian's minds before all else. A love for our Lord and a love for all those around us.
Unfortunately, because love is not at the forefront it should be with a lot of people, the title of Christianity is tainted. People get a bad taste in their mouths at the mention - I don't blame them. When you see the way some Christians treat homosexuals, supposedly in the name of God, or goes around condemning people to hell - it's appalling. And of course those who live two separate lives - it doesn't show our Lord in a good light at all, which is a shame.
Beyond the misconceptions of what Christianity really is supposed to be, atheists do tend to have a problem with the actual image of God Himself, but I do believe that a lot of them derive their informations from the wrong sources. Or else, it's just simplified. There is a lot to the Bible than meets then eyes, that does require intricate study and a complete knowledge of the context.
The thing is, those set against being so against my faith spent more time studying the evidence against rather than the evidence for. It's bound to happen - just a subconscious bias. In order to create a thorough decision, both sides of the issue to need to be covered.
Now I'm somewhat distracted as I write this, so I'll probably leave more to another note. But I do want to point out "The Case for Christ", a book written by an atheist who sent out to disprove Christianity and ended up becoming a Christian himself. It's an intriguing concept, right?
But you come from an event like Prayer in the Square, when thousands of people are packed into a block at Times Square, praising and worshipping sincerely and passionately, and you can just feel a greater power at work. Something undeniable. I'm sure everybody who walked by - believer or not - felt something to. A mere myth able to compel so many people so consistently for so long. To change around so many lives. That's not some religion - that's God.
Y'all Ought to be Ashamed.
From August 10, 2008
Yeah, I'm about to chew you out.
I don't know where anyone gets off thinking that the word "nigger" is okay to say depending on the context. And I think it's very ridiculous to say "white people can be 'n words', too" yet every time I've heard that word used these past few months, it was not in regards to anyone white.
I know that I spent nine months at NYU, in which black people are the extreme minority, yet I never heard the 'n word' ever uttered. To go even further, I didn't even encounter the more subtle racism - the slight discrimination, the "casual" verbal judgments. The only references to me even being black were made by myself in a joking manner or by other minorities, also in a joking manner. But outside of that, there were at the most two references made in the WHOLE year by the majority group to me being black.
It's a Southern thing.
Everybody's racist, though. Don't even attempt to deny it. I hate it when people try to preface statements with "I'm not racist, but...", because yes, you are, and yes that statement you're about to say is sooo racist. Unfortunately in this current society, it's a bit of an inherent thing. But what you say, how you act, and the unfair judgments you make can be controlled.
So if a black person pisses you off, there's no reason to be calling him the n-word. Surely you have to know the history behind that word. How demeaning it has always been and how it was created to be geared solely towards black people. Thus, it is highly disrespectful to use that word. Period - I don't care if you only use that in regards to "ghetto" people or you even all white people that sometimes, it's still a highly offensive and completely disrespectful term.
Now my feelings don't get hurt every time that's said. I just get upset because it showcases ignorance and disrespect. You throw around such a weighted and negative term like it's nothing, like a group of people haven't been fighting against it and other discriminations for generations. Call someone an "asshole". I can't say I condone of that, either, but at least it has none of the attached sentiments that the n-word, though.
I was talking to Carmen about this, and she understood my views of how I don't take it personally, but just find it incredibly disrespectul and thus, infuriating, because that's the way that she gets with the word "faggot." It is, in fact, that same deal. Leading into this.
I am not a gay rights activist. I'll be honest - I'm a Christian, the Bible does say that a man should not lay with a man the way he does a woman, and do find it to be unnatural. However, the treatment of homosexuals is appalling. The "f-word" is meant to demean and belittle a specific group of people. In the same way as the "n-word", it's a term that dehumanizes, thus implying that that individual is not good enough to be given an actual identity, so thus he will be called the "f-word" instead.
See, that is some people have such severe problems with Christians. We're supposedly apart of a faith built about love, yet some of us throw around those terms like nothing, though obviously they are quite hurtful. Do you seriously think that if Jesus was on Earth right now, he'd go around to gay people, calling them "faggots" and "queers." No, this is Jesus, who hung out with prostitutes and tax collectors - the bottom of society at that time.
The foundation of Christianity is love. God loved us so much that He gave His only Son to die for our sins. Thus we are to show love in return - both to God and to those around us. Love, not condemn. Not treat a group of people so differently because we don't agree with their lifestyles.
It's quite hypocritical, too, in many ways, but especially because a lot Christians are willing to look past the sins of others and their own sins, yet come down so hard on homosexuality, as if it's the sin to end all sins. In my personal opinion, it's the most harmless. Promiscuous sex is way more damaging, if we're on the subject of sexuality. But God doesn't have a rating system of sin.
But it's pathetically funny, because surely if you ask some Christian what is worse - some guy who sleeps around a lot or a gay guy who is a virgin by choice, they'd say the former. That is not right.
Then there's the whole thing about how homosexuality is "different" because it's a lifestyle as opposed to an one-time act. Well, if you want to get technical, the "act" of someone being emotionally and physically attracted to someone of the same sex and pursuing a relationship with them is not a sin unless sex is involved, but rather the individual act of sex with someone of the same sex. I've read my Bible - and yes, it's all technical, so I won't dwell on that issue.
But is not anyone who is not a born again Christian living a sinful lifestyle, then? Yet there is a significantly less discrimination against those who aren't Christian than there is against homosexuals specifically.
Then the other "argument" is that supposedly one cannot be a Christian and a homosexual. But that's like saying that anyone who sins cannot be a Christian. Which of course is not true, because then no one would be a Christian. And then they'd bring up the whole "lifestyle" thing again, but is a Christian who has a problem with lying not a Christian? Or one who has a drinking problem?
But what it comes down to it all is that we really cannot define what a Christian is for others, now can we? We're just imperfect humans ourselves. So we have no right whatsoever to say that anyone isn't really a Christian, nor to condemn someone for anything, because that is for God and God alone.
We have no right to look down on anyone, homosexuals included, because we are not perfect ourselves.
Look up John 8:1-12. I'll paraphrase it. The Pharisees bring an adulterous woman to Jesus, saying that she needs to be stoned. Jesus says that whoever is that who is without sin can throw the first stone. No one, of course, does. Jesus then asks the woman where her accusers are, in which she answers that there aren't any. So Jesus says that He does not condemn her, either, and let's her go free,then tells us that we are to be like Him.
So maybe the next time you come across a homosexual and are getting ready to spit out a biting comment, think of these verses. It is not our place at all. It is between that person and God. And if some person is truly a Christian, but also a homosexual, then it will be taken care of if they do have that relationship with God. What "taken care of" means, none of us know, but it's not for us to know. Worry about yourself, and if you want to worry about others, do it respectfully and focus more on salvation.
We also should not look down on anyone, because we are supposed to approach everyone with love.
Matthew 22:37-40
Jesus replied, “‘Love the Lord your God will all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
I don't see anything about "don't be homosexual" or "condemn all homosexuals" or "call all gay people 'faggots'" or anything remotely like this. But love the Lord, then love your neighbor. Being condescending has nothing to do with love at all.
There are so many issues with the way people treat others in general. We're all guilty of it, myself included, of course. But if we work to improve on this by tackling the major cases first, or maybe even the minor cases, then we can improve. A lot of issues in this world would be solved if we just consistently treated people right.
I think if I write another note like this, it will be about forgiveness vs revenge. That's another thing I see a lot.
Yeah, I'm about to chew you out.
I don't know where anyone gets off thinking that the word "nigger" is okay to say depending on the context. And I think it's very ridiculous to say "white people can be 'n words', too" yet every time I've heard that word used these past few months, it was not in regards to anyone white.
I know that I spent nine months at NYU, in which black people are the extreme minority, yet I never heard the 'n word' ever uttered. To go even further, I didn't even encounter the more subtle racism - the slight discrimination, the "casual" verbal judgments. The only references to me even being black were made by myself in a joking manner or by other minorities, also in a joking manner. But outside of that, there were at the most two references made in the WHOLE year by the majority group to me being black.
It's a Southern thing.
Everybody's racist, though. Don't even attempt to deny it. I hate it when people try to preface statements with "I'm not racist, but...", because yes, you are, and yes that statement you're about to say is sooo racist. Unfortunately in this current society, it's a bit of an inherent thing. But what you say, how you act, and the unfair judgments you make can be controlled.
So if a black person pisses you off, there's no reason to be calling him the n-word. Surely you have to know the history behind that word. How demeaning it has always been and how it was created to be geared solely towards black people. Thus, it is highly disrespectful to use that word. Period - I don't care if you only use that in regards to "ghetto" people or you even all white people that sometimes, it's still a highly offensive and completely disrespectful term.
Now my feelings don't get hurt every time that's said. I just get upset because it showcases ignorance and disrespect. You throw around such a weighted and negative term like it's nothing, like a group of people haven't been fighting against it and other discriminations for generations. Call someone an "asshole". I can't say I condone of that, either, but at least it has none of the attached sentiments that the n-word, though.
I was talking to Carmen about this, and she understood my views of how I don't take it personally, but just find it incredibly disrespectul and thus, infuriating, because that's the way that she gets with the word "faggot." It is, in fact, that same deal. Leading into this.
I am not a gay rights activist. I'll be honest - I'm a Christian, the Bible does say that a man should not lay with a man the way he does a woman, and do find it to be unnatural. However, the treatment of homosexuals is appalling. The "f-word" is meant to demean and belittle a specific group of people. In the same way as the "n-word", it's a term that dehumanizes, thus implying that that individual is not good enough to be given an actual identity, so thus he will be called the "f-word" instead.
See, that is some people have such severe problems with Christians. We're supposedly apart of a faith built about love, yet some of us throw around those terms like nothing, though obviously they are quite hurtful. Do you seriously think that if Jesus was on Earth right now, he'd go around to gay people, calling them "faggots" and "queers." No, this is Jesus, who hung out with prostitutes and tax collectors - the bottom of society at that time.
The foundation of Christianity is love. God loved us so much that He gave His only Son to die for our sins. Thus we are to show love in return - both to God and to those around us. Love, not condemn. Not treat a group of people so differently because we don't agree with their lifestyles.
It's quite hypocritical, too, in many ways, but especially because a lot Christians are willing to look past the sins of others and their own sins, yet come down so hard on homosexuality, as if it's the sin to end all sins. In my personal opinion, it's the most harmless. Promiscuous sex is way more damaging, if we're on the subject of sexuality. But God doesn't have a rating system of sin.
But it's pathetically funny, because surely if you ask some Christian what is worse - some guy who sleeps around a lot or a gay guy who is a virgin by choice, they'd say the former. That is not right.
Then there's the whole thing about how homosexuality is "different" because it's a lifestyle as opposed to an one-time act. Well, if you want to get technical, the "act" of someone being emotionally and physically attracted to someone of the same sex and pursuing a relationship with them is not a sin unless sex is involved, but rather the individual act of sex with someone of the same sex. I've read my Bible - and yes, it's all technical, so I won't dwell on that issue.
But is not anyone who is not a born again Christian living a sinful lifestyle, then? Yet there is a significantly less discrimination against those who aren't Christian than there is against homosexuals specifically.
Then the other "argument" is that supposedly one cannot be a Christian and a homosexual. But that's like saying that anyone who sins cannot be a Christian. Which of course is not true, because then no one would be a Christian. And then they'd bring up the whole "lifestyle" thing again, but is a Christian who has a problem with lying not a Christian? Or one who has a drinking problem?
But what it comes down to it all is that we really cannot define what a Christian is for others, now can we? We're just imperfect humans ourselves. So we have no right whatsoever to say that anyone isn't really a Christian, nor to condemn someone for anything, because that is for God and God alone.
We have no right to look down on anyone, homosexuals included, because we are not perfect ourselves.
Look up John 8:1-12. I'll paraphrase it. The Pharisees bring an adulterous woman to Jesus, saying that she needs to be stoned. Jesus says that whoever is that who is without sin can throw the first stone. No one, of course, does. Jesus then asks the woman where her accusers are, in which she answers that there aren't any. So Jesus says that He does not condemn her, either, and let's her go free,then tells us that we are to be like Him.
So maybe the next time you come across a homosexual and are getting ready to spit out a biting comment, think of these verses. It is not our place at all. It is between that person and God. And if some person is truly a Christian, but also a homosexual, then it will be taken care of if they do have that relationship with God. What "taken care of" means, none of us know, but it's not for us to know. Worry about yourself, and if you want to worry about others, do it respectfully and focus more on salvation.
We also should not look down on anyone, because we are supposed to approach everyone with love.
Matthew 22:37-40
Jesus replied, “‘Love the Lord your God will all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
I don't see anything about "don't be homosexual" or "condemn all homosexuals" or "call all gay people 'faggots'" or anything remotely like this. But love the Lord, then love your neighbor. Being condescending has nothing to do with love at all.
There are so many issues with the way people treat others in general. We're all guilty of it, myself included, of course. But if we work to improve on this by tackling the major cases first, or maybe even the minor cases, then we can improve. A lot of issues in this world would be solved if we just consistently treated people right.
I think if I write another note like this, it will be about forgiveness vs revenge. That's another thing I see a lot.
I don't care too much for mansions. Mansions can't buy me love.
From October 24, 2008
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
I always looked at that verse as to how we should love. And it definitely is a great template for that. But it has just occurred to me that that is how God loves us. Of course, I've always believed in the love of God, always known of it, but never exactly delved into what that exactly meant. It's just always been a general thing. But reading every single descriptor of love up above and knowing that that entails the love we receive from Jesus, just makes verses like Romans 8:38-39 even more comforting.
Something I feel like I've dealt with the past few months is specifically stated above - "it keeps no records of wrongs." And I know God forgives - we only have to ask, but it never stopped me from feeling ashamed, dirty - sometimes not even worthy of being apart of God. But that's a fallacy, and all on my part. Because though I can never forgive and forget, God most certainly does. And I may dwell in shame because of my sin, very well past the time I committed it, but there's no need to. God isn't holding it against me. I've sincerely asked for my forgiveness - it's time to move on.
I felt so guilty. I felt as God was telling me something, leading me to a certain direction, and I completely chickened out. I wasn't strong enough because I could act on what the Lord was telling me. But I had a realization today. God understands. He knows how hard it was, that I am only human - He knows exactly why I could've step up to the call. And instead of picturing Him looking down on me and shaking His head in disappointment, I picture Him smiling comfortingly at me, still loving me, telling me "It's okay, Chanelle. It's okay."
Of course, He would've been absolutely thrilled if I'd had the courage to go forth, despite it all. But he's not ashamed of me because I didn't, and I truly feel that in my heart. He knows my shortcomings, but is patient with them, because He loves me, and as the verse entails - "love is patient." And though undoubtedly it would've been better if I just would've pushed through in His intended direction, things will still come together perfectly. Albeit in a different way, but it still will - I know that.
I finally feel like I'm getting it right again, and it feels amazing
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
I always looked at that verse as to how we should love. And it definitely is a great template for that. But it has just occurred to me that that is how God loves us. Of course, I've always believed in the love of God, always known of it, but never exactly delved into what that exactly meant. It's just always been a general thing. But reading every single descriptor of love up above and knowing that that entails the love we receive from Jesus, just makes verses like Romans 8:38-39 even more comforting.
Something I feel like I've dealt with the past few months is specifically stated above - "it keeps no records of wrongs." And I know God forgives - we only have to ask, but it never stopped me from feeling ashamed, dirty - sometimes not even worthy of being apart of God. But that's a fallacy, and all on my part. Because though I can never forgive and forget, God most certainly does. And I may dwell in shame because of my sin, very well past the time I committed it, but there's no need to. God isn't holding it against me. I've sincerely asked for my forgiveness - it's time to move on.
I felt so guilty. I felt as God was telling me something, leading me to a certain direction, and I completely chickened out. I wasn't strong enough because I could act on what the Lord was telling me. But I had a realization today. God understands. He knows how hard it was, that I am only human - He knows exactly why I could've step up to the call. And instead of picturing Him looking down on me and shaking His head in disappointment, I picture Him smiling comfortingly at me, still loving me, telling me "It's okay, Chanelle. It's okay."
Of course, He would've been absolutely thrilled if I'd had the courage to go forth, despite it all. But he's not ashamed of me because I didn't, and I truly feel that in my heart. He knows my shortcomings, but is patient with them, because He loves me, and as the verse entails - "love is patient." And though undoubtedly it would've been better if I just would've pushed through in His intended direction, things will still come together perfectly. Albeit in a different way, but it still will - I know that.
I finally feel like I'm getting it right again, and it feels amazing
Therefore let us pursue things which make for peace...
From November 7, 2008
"Receive one who is weak in faith, but not to disputes over doubtful things.
For one believes he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats only vegetables.
Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats; for God has received him.
Who are you to judge another's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed, he will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand.
One person esteems one day above another; another esteems every day alike. Let each be fully convinced in his own mind.
He who observes the day, observes it to the Lord, and he who does not observe the day, to the Lord he does not observe it. He who eats, eats to the Lord, for he gives God thanks; and he who does not eat, to the Lord he does not eat, and gives God thanks.
For none of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself.
For if we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we are the Lord's.
For to this end Christ died and rose and lived again, that He might be Lord of both the dead and the living.
By why do you judge your brother? Or why do you show contempt for your brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ.
For it is written:
'As I live, says the Lord
Every knee shall bow to Me,
And every tongue shall confess to God.'
So then each of us shall give account of himself to God.
Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother's way."
Romans 14:13
Given the recent dissension amongst Christians in lieu of the result of the most recent elections, I had a note prepared, delving deeper into a case I had already made, hoping to make a point. It was calmly written - it was a passionate note, but it was not an angry or accusatory one, but definitely one meant to prove a point.
I posted this note, let it settle for awhile, but in the midst of my procrastinations and distractions, I somehow returned to the note. The in that moment, a strong feeling arose in my gut. Immediately, I knew what the feeling meant - take down that note.
Immediately, I was reluctant and determined to ignore it. Yet as I moved to X-out of the page, the feeling remained, and I knew it would be a blatant disregard to God's will if I left it up. Against better judgment, my reaction still was along the lines of "Well, He'll get over it. Tomorrow, it won't matter."
But then God brought this verse to my heart, a verse I had came across earlier that day. Romans 14:19 - "Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification."
And then He spoke to me (and I loosely quote):
"Chanelle, take down the note. You're not wrong, but it won't bring the Christian people together. Take it down."
So I did.
And it's true. It doesn't matter what I intended on fighting or how eloquently and nicely I put it. It doesn't matter how right I believe I am, or how good my intentions were in posting it, because it would've naturally caused disagreement. And though arguing has its fruits, when it gets to the point where it's pitting Christian against Christian - not just over any subject, but over God's Word, Will, and Intent - then we're teetering into something dangerous.
There's nothing wrong with a calm discussion, exploring different sides of an issues, and trying to mutually discover and derive a true meaning, whilst respecting and giving merit to each other's viewpoints. But there's a pretense set to these sort of discussions usually, and the intent is to discover as opposed to convincing.
But I had seen how other arguments on this particular subject developed - it was border-lining malicious with no sort of conceding and barely any respect. Given the subject of my note, there was a high chance that this comment section would've turned into a battlefield. As Christians, that is not what God wants from us - to be pitted against one another over a discord in beliefs, when at the heart of it, we believe in the exact same thing - the love of Jesus Christ.
Both sides were advocating for the same Lord, deriving their reasoning from the same Word, and ultimately came to a conclusion that they felt succeeded in glorifying the Kingdom. Perhaps we need to be focusing on that, because in this world, the last thing we need is a thick, black line separating the Christian community. We can argue over other things as much as we want, but I am quite certain that at least that is not God's Will for us as a body.
I am still highly bothered by some of the things expressed in recent days, but I just have to let it go. That is why I will argue no more, for the stability of our body is more important than defending my viewpoint and what it says about my relationship with God when I am quite confident in it already.
So we shouldn't judge or fight against each other - don't worry about what the other person says about a particular issue in regards to their faith in Christ and if it makes them more or less of a Christian, because the definition of a Christian is not up to us, and if a person's heart really belongs to Christ, despite his opinion on a matter - may it be wrong or right -"God is able to make him stand."
I guess it's less about making sure our specific beliefs align, but realizing that a person can, for example, believe that it is God's will that everyone has a choice (even if it is a choice that we vehemently disagree with), and still most definitely be a serious Christian, just as much as someone who dons the complete opposite standpoint, for "God has received" both. It is not that which defines our faith, but our love for the Lord and our love for others, and what we strive to do to promote both.
And if what we're doing is not out of love, then we have an issue. And I realize that the kind of arguing that I was participating in and potentially promoting was not creating an environment of love, but encouraging a divide. And that does not lead to either peace or mutual edification of the Christian body.
So I apologize for arguing. I stand by what I believe, but fact of the matter is, we've all given up our lives for the same Savior and are all trying to live according to the same purpose - His purpose, and derive our convictions, beliefs, and actions for the same Word. And that's all that matters. So instead of bickering amongst ourselves, instead "let us each be fully convinced in our own mind[s]", let's turn our focus and energy outwards in order to have a truly positive effect on this world by living our lives the right way.
"Receive one who is weak in faith, but not to disputes over doubtful things.
For one believes he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats only vegetables.
Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats; for God has received him.
Who are you to judge another's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed, he will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand.
One person esteems one day above another; another esteems every day alike. Let each be fully convinced in his own mind.
He who observes the day, observes it to the Lord, and he who does not observe the day, to the Lord he does not observe it. He who eats, eats to the Lord, for he gives God thanks; and he who does not eat, to the Lord he does not eat, and gives God thanks.
For none of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself.
For if we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we are the Lord's.
For to this end Christ died and rose and lived again, that He might be Lord of both the dead and the living.
By why do you judge your brother? Or why do you show contempt for your brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ.
For it is written:
'As I live, says the Lord
Every knee shall bow to Me,
And every tongue shall confess to God.'
So then each of us shall give account of himself to God.
Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother's way."
Romans 14:13
Given the recent dissension amongst Christians in lieu of the result of the most recent elections, I had a note prepared, delving deeper into a case I had already made, hoping to make a point. It was calmly written - it was a passionate note, but it was not an angry or accusatory one, but definitely one meant to prove a point.
I posted this note, let it settle for awhile, but in the midst of my procrastinations and distractions, I somehow returned to the note. The in that moment, a strong feeling arose in my gut. Immediately, I knew what the feeling meant - take down that note.
Immediately, I was reluctant and determined to ignore it. Yet as I moved to X-out of the page, the feeling remained, and I knew it would be a blatant disregard to God's will if I left it up. Against better judgment, my reaction still was along the lines of "Well, He'll get over it. Tomorrow, it won't matter."
But then God brought this verse to my heart, a verse I had came across earlier that day. Romans 14:19 - "Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification."
And then He spoke to me (and I loosely quote):
"Chanelle, take down the note. You're not wrong, but it won't bring the Christian people together. Take it down."
So I did.
And it's true. It doesn't matter what I intended on fighting or how eloquently and nicely I put it. It doesn't matter how right I believe I am, or how good my intentions were in posting it, because it would've naturally caused disagreement. And though arguing has its fruits, when it gets to the point where it's pitting Christian against Christian - not just over any subject, but over God's Word, Will, and Intent - then we're teetering into something dangerous.
There's nothing wrong with a calm discussion, exploring different sides of an issues, and trying to mutually discover and derive a true meaning, whilst respecting and giving merit to each other's viewpoints. But there's a pretense set to these sort of discussions usually, and the intent is to discover as opposed to convincing.
But I had seen how other arguments on this particular subject developed - it was border-lining malicious with no sort of conceding and barely any respect. Given the subject of my note, there was a high chance that this comment section would've turned into a battlefield. As Christians, that is not what God wants from us - to be pitted against one another over a discord in beliefs, when at the heart of it, we believe in the exact same thing - the love of Jesus Christ.
Both sides were advocating for the same Lord, deriving their reasoning from the same Word, and ultimately came to a conclusion that they felt succeeded in glorifying the Kingdom. Perhaps we need to be focusing on that, because in this world, the last thing we need is a thick, black line separating the Christian community. We can argue over other things as much as we want, but I am quite certain that at least that is not God's Will for us as a body.
I am still highly bothered by some of the things expressed in recent days, but I just have to let it go. That is why I will argue no more, for the stability of our body is more important than defending my viewpoint and what it says about my relationship with God when I am quite confident in it already.
So we shouldn't judge or fight against each other - don't worry about what the other person says about a particular issue in regards to their faith in Christ and if it makes them more or less of a Christian, because the definition of a Christian is not up to us, and if a person's heart really belongs to Christ, despite his opinion on a matter - may it be wrong or right -"God is able to make him stand."
I guess it's less about making sure our specific beliefs align, but realizing that a person can, for example, believe that it is God's will that everyone has a choice (even if it is a choice that we vehemently disagree with), and still most definitely be a serious Christian, just as much as someone who dons the complete opposite standpoint, for "God has received" both. It is not that which defines our faith, but our love for the Lord and our love for others, and what we strive to do to promote both.
And if what we're doing is not out of love, then we have an issue. And I realize that the kind of arguing that I was participating in and potentially promoting was not creating an environment of love, but encouraging a divide. And that does not lead to either peace or mutual edification of the Christian body.
So I apologize for arguing. I stand by what I believe, but fact of the matter is, we've all given up our lives for the same Savior and are all trying to live according to the same purpose - His purpose, and derive our convictions, beliefs, and actions for the same Word. And that's all that matters. So instead of bickering amongst ourselves, instead "let us each be fully convinced in our own mind[s]", let's turn our focus and energy outwards in order to have a truly positive effect on this world by living our lives the right way.
From What I Derive My Justification
From November 5, 2008
Matthew 25:40
The Kings will reply, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."
Luke 14:13-14
But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.
Luke 12:32-33
Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give to the poor.
Matthew 5:46-47
If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
Romans 14:19
Let us therefor make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.
Romans 14:4
Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own mater he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand.
Romans 15:13
Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way.
John 8:15-16
"You judge according to the flesh; I judge no one. And yet if I do judge, My judgment is true; for I am not alone, but I am with the Father who sent Me."
Matthew 14:14
When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, He had compassion on them and healed their sick.
Acts 2:45
Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.
Romans 13:8;10
Let no debt remind outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law. Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefor love is the fulfillment of the law.
Matthew 25:40
The Kings will reply, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."
Luke 14:13-14
But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.
Luke 12:32-33
Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give to the poor.
Matthew 5:46-47
If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
Romans 14:19
Let us therefor make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.
Romans 14:4
Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own mater he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand.
Romans 15:13
Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way.
John 8:15-16
"You judge according to the flesh; I judge no one. And yet if I do judge, My judgment is true; for I am not alone, but I am with the Father who sent Me."
Matthew 14:14
When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, He had compassion on them and healed their sick.
Acts 2:45
Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.
Romans 13:8;10
Let no debt remind outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law. Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefor love is the fulfillment of the law.
He shall overcome.
From February 6, 2009
John 16:33
"These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."
Interesting how I came across this verse earlier tonight, already highlighted, during Bible study when we were looking at a different, unrelated passaged in John. Interesting because later that night, this was the verse that framed my exact mindset, because I have no doubt in my mind that the words of that verse is absolutely true, but it is so frustrating to know that people who hold my same beliefs, own the same Word, overlook this in favor of saturating in the pains and trials of this world. Frustrating because more than anything, I just want people to have the same peace of mind that I have, and it's so close within their reach, but it's denied.
It was all these thoughts going through my head as I sat on the phone with my mom, in the midst of recession talk and stories of the distress of her clients, when I recalled that perfect verse I had encountered hours before. And John 16:33 holds so many wonders, from the words Jesus spoke, to the fact that that verse was so meticulously and purposely reappeared in my life at the exact moment I needed it to be. The fact that it was previously highlighted, thus ensuring that it would catch my attention. How the way it was highlighted lets me know that it was from a church service rather than my own studies, meaning it wasn't even necessarily something that personally struck me at the moment, but rather something I was instructed to read. The timing and the fit were perfect - that is God for you.
And I don't care if I sound foolish. These moments happen to frequently for me to be able to possibly dismiss them as mere coincidence or chance. I took statistics - the odds aren't that good. And maybe more so foolish by definition of others than believing that God's careful hands guided everything in a planned and flawless way up to the exact moment that a verse came to my attention is that I have a total peace of mind. Every thing that is going wrong is flying into my face from multiple directions, and I find myself not flinching, but smiling and living, and most importantly, believing, because this strength definitely does not come from myself, but rather from Jesus, because I have faith in every single promise He has laid out for me in His Word, and in the face of recession, divorce, housing crisis, and whatever else may be flawed, my life is perfect solely because of His love for me and what that results in.
Don't you see what He's telling us? Be of good cheer. He's not just telling us to believe - He's telling us to keep our spirits high. It's a habit to believe that everything will work out for the good, but to do so in depression and apathy - drudging through days with heads down waiting sadly for the moment when it call gets better. But if we know it will get better, then why wade in the depths? Let us laugh and sing - look these things that plague us straight in the eye and smile widely, because we know that there is something greater that we have. Greater than the world and all its troubles.
What I love is that Jesus does not skirt around the truth. He straight up tells us - the world will have tribulations. Not might. Not possibly. Will. There's never a guarantee that life in this world will be flawless - in fact, there's a guarantee that it will be quite the opposite. But what's amazing is that we're offered peace through Him. And I think Christians have a habit of getting so bogged down in our lives that we forget that. And it's truly tragic, because Jesus offers such an amazing thing to us, and we ignore it. We could have peace, but instead we let these tribulations attack our spirits.
So the walls are closing all around me. But I ignore it. I've found myself far away from the trivial problems that use to plague me in high school, because know I'm in the midst of serious problems - greater than I've ever known - and I don't know how they will affect my family and I. But in these moments when everything could easily fall apart - not just externally, but inside of me - I have chosen to graciously accept Jesus' offer of peace. And I have the upmost confidence that He will see me through. And believe me, I'm looking forward to see how He helps us overcome these hurdles, because by my limited understanding, I see no way, but I know that with Him, there is always a way.
And I don't know if you can comprehend (or maybe you can) how amazingly sound I feel right now, having that confidence in my Lord. I respect the tribulations at hand, I don't underestimate them, but I know my Lord, and I know that things will be taken care of. I don't know how or when, but they will. And that is good enough for me.
So I am going to be in good cheer, because Jesus says I can. I will go through my life, not letting these tribulations touch my mood or spirit. I will smile and laugh. I will dance and love. I will hold on with every fiber of my being to the power of my Lord, because that's all that will get me through. And I encourage every believer who hasn't already to let go to the burdens and do the same. Because you know what?
Jesus has overcome the world!
John 16:33
"These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."
Interesting how I came across this verse earlier tonight, already highlighted, during Bible study when we were looking at a different, unrelated passaged in John. Interesting because later that night, this was the verse that framed my exact mindset, because I have no doubt in my mind that the words of that verse is absolutely true, but it is so frustrating to know that people who hold my same beliefs, own the same Word, overlook this in favor of saturating in the pains and trials of this world. Frustrating because more than anything, I just want people to have the same peace of mind that I have, and it's so close within their reach, but it's denied.
It was all these thoughts going through my head as I sat on the phone with my mom, in the midst of recession talk and stories of the distress of her clients, when I recalled that perfect verse I had encountered hours before. And John 16:33 holds so many wonders, from the words Jesus spoke, to the fact that that verse was so meticulously and purposely reappeared in my life at the exact moment I needed it to be. The fact that it was previously highlighted, thus ensuring that it would catch my attention. How the way it was highlighted lets me know that it was from a church service rather than my own studies, meaning it wasn't even necessarily something that personally struck me at the moment, but rather something I was instructed to read. The timing and the fit were perfect - that is God for you.
And I don't care if I sound foolish. These moments happen to frequently for me to be able to possibly dismiss them as mere coincidence or chance. I took statistics - the odds aren't that good. And maybe more so foolish by definition of others than believing that God's careful hands guided everything in a planned and flawless way up to the exact moment that a verse came to my attention is that I have a total peace of mind. Every thing that is going wrong is flying into my face from multiple directions, and I find myself not flinching, but smiling and living, and most importantly, believing, because this strength definitely does not come from myself, but rather from Jesus, because I have faith in every single promise He has laid out for me in His Word, and in the face of recession, divorce, housing crisis, and whatever else may be flawed, my life is perfect solely because of His love for me and what that results in.
Don't you see what He's telling us? Be of good cheer. He's not just telling us to believe - He's telling us to keep our spirits high. It's a habit to believe that everything will work out for the good, but to do so in depression and apathy - drudging through days with heads down waiting sadly for the moment when it call gets better. But if we know it will get better, then why wade in the depths? Let us laugh and sing - look these things that plague us straight in the eye and smile widely, because we know that there is something greater that we have. Greater than the world and all its troubles.
What I love is that Jesus does not skirt around the truth. He straight up tells us - the world will have tribulations. Not might. Not possibly. Will. There's never a guarantee that life in this world will be flawless - in fact, there's a guarantee that it will be quite the opposite. But what's amazing is that we're offered peace through Him. And I think Christians have a habit of getting so bogged down in our lives that we forget that. And it's truly tragic, because Jesus offers such an amazing thing to us, and we ignore it. We could have peace, but instead we let these tribulations attack our spirits.
So the walls are closing all around me. But I ignore it. I've found myself far away from the trivial problems that use to plague me in high school, because know I'm in the midst of serious problems - greater than I've ever known - and I don't know how they will affect my family and I. But in these moments when everything could easily fall apart - not just externally, but inside of me - I have chosen to graciously accept Jesus' offer of peace. And I have the upmost confidence that He will see me through. And believe me, I'm looking forward to see how He helps us overcome these hurdles, because by my limited understanding, I see no way, but I know that with Him, there is always a way.
And I don't know if you can comprehend (or maybe you can) how amazingly sound I feel right now, having that confidence in my Lord. I respect the tribulations at hand, I don't underestimate them, but I know my Lord, and I know that things will be taken care of. I don't know how or when, but they will. And that is good enough for me.
So I am going to be in good cheer, because Jesus says I can. I will go through my life, not letting these tribulations touch my mood or spirit. I will smile and laugh. I will dance and love. I will hold on with every fiber of my being to the power of my Lord, because that's all that will get me through. And I encourage every believer who hasn't already to let go to the burdens and do the same. Because you know what?
Jesus has overcome the world!
You are truly all that I need.
From April 13, 2009
I just had this feeling come over me.
The feeling of God's arms wrapping around me securely. His head on my shoulder. The sheer power of His endless love as He whispers in my ear, "I've got you, Chanelle. Everything will be okay - I'm taking care of it. I love you."
He's in this room with me. I feel Him, I absolutely know. There are very few things that I can ever be certain of in this life, and there is nothing I am more sure of in this moment than the presence of the Lord, reassuring me.
And how can I not smile widely? The foundations of a life I used to know are forever crumbling into something so perverted that it's unrecognizable. Things are getting more frantic now - I'm living week by week now. There's $162 in my bank account and nothing else is coming in. My meal plans running out, my jeans are ripping to shreds. Hopes of my childhood have shattered - the family I wished to maintain officially broken, and every single things lies completely out of my control. By the end of May, I'll be in the midst of a life completely different than one I've ever thought I'd know.
But why worry? "Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouses nor barn; and God feeds them. And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest?"
My God will provide for me, this I know. And it's hard to know. I was on the cusp of a legitimate panic attack last night, pacing my room as the distress and hopeless threatened to overcome me. But then tonight I sit here, and I'm the farthest away from that, because it has been confirmed that God is not going anywhere. He will remain by my side.
He is my only certain in life. And I'm absolutely fine with that. I don't know where my next meals are coming from, but I know they're coming. I don't know where I'm going to be living coming this summer, but I know I'll be living somewhere. And how $162 is going to stretch at least three weeks, I have no idea, but I do know it's going to stretch. That's the kind of confidence I have with my God.
So it seems kind of silly to worry. It seems very silly to have these problems take such a high stock in my life. Because how can anything truly be bad when I can feel the presence of the Lord right here next to me? It is the most glorious, reassuring, beautiful feeling, and in the face of that kind of perfection, everything else kind of just fizzles away.
I just had this feeling come over me.
The feeling of God's arms wrapping around me securely. His head on my shoulder. The sheer power of His endless love as He whispers in my ear, "I've got you, Chanelle. Everything will be okay - I'm taking care of it. I love you."
He's in this room with me. I feel Him, I absolutely know. There are very few things that I can ever be certain of in this life, and there is nothing I am more sure of in this moment than the presence of the Lord, reassuring me.
And how can I not smile widely? The foundations of a life I used to know are forever crumbling into something so perverted that it's unrecognizable. Things are getting more frantic now - I'm living week by week now. There's $162 in my bank account and nothing else is coming in. My meal plans running out, my jeans are ripping to shreds. Hopes of my childhood have shattered - the family I wished to maintain officially broken, and every single things lies completely out of my control. By the end of May, I'll be in the midst of a life completely different than one I've ever thought I'd know.
But why worry? "Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, which have neither storehouses nor barn; and God feeds them. And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest?"
My God will provide for me, this I know. And it's hard to know. I was on the cusp of a legitimate panic attack last night, pacing my room as the distress and hopeless threatened to overcome me. But then tonight I sit here, and I'm the farthest away from that, because it has been confirmed that God is not going anywhere. He will remain by my side.
He is my only certain in life. And I'm absolutely fine with that. I don't know where my next meals are coming from, but I know they're coming. I don't know where I'm going to be living coming this summer, but I know I'll be living somewhere. And how $162 is going to stretch at least three weeks, I have no idea, but I do know it's going to stretch. That's the kind of confidence I have with my God.
So it seems kind of silly to worry. It seems very silly to have these problems take such a high stock in my life. Because how can anything truly be bad when I can feel the presence of the Lord right here next to me? It is the most glorious, reassuring, beautiful feeling, and in the face of that kind of perfection, everything else kind of just fizzles away.
Forever.
From February 26, 2010
I found myself consumed by the Word earlier today while having a Bible study with a close friend of mine, and as these things often do we were led off of the path we originally intended on following and ended up talking about eternity.
It isn't something I've particularly thought about in depth lately, but the times I do think about it it has my head spinning. The concept of infinity - it's obviously something we're just not meant to truly comprehend in our human minds. As I discussed eternity today, however - this concept of forever - I wasn't slammed confusion or the disorienting of my mind, but rather felt a comforting blanket of peace and most distinctly, excitement, bubble up warmly in my stomach. I didn't take the time in the moment to try and discover why. I just knew I couldn't keep the goofy smile off of my face.
Now I have a chance to let that settle. What is it exactly that's so alluring about eternity - something that is so incomprehensible ? But I realize, it lies simply in this: to spend forever basking in the ever present glory of God...nothing seems better.
In fact, if I were to lay out my idea of perfection right now, describe what makes up my craziest, most coveted fantasies - that's what it is right there. Forever with my Lord, who I love so much, who loves me even more. Who knew paradise could be worded so simply? And the most amazing part is, it's so obtainable...in fact, it's already secured. Sometimes I lament over the fact that it seems like I have nothing to look forward to. Another day identical to the one last week, and maybe graduation is creeping around the corner, but that's still months away, and what happens after I'm handed my diploma, anyway?
But that's a foolish train of thought, because I have the most amazing thing waiting for me. It's certain, and it's wonderful, and I can't wait for perfection. I can't wait to be smiling all the time. I can't wait to bow before my Lord, and sing His praises in His very presence - forever! Being somewhat of a closet commitment-phobe who can hardly even stay still for more than a few minutes, the concept of forever should be frightening. But with the Lord involved, it just has me feeling like I'm floating.
The conversation of eternity naturally turned to what exactly will it be like once we're in this new Heaven and Earth. And of course, maybe details are foggy, widely left up to interpretation, but we came across this verse that describes it perfectly. As I read the words out loud, I almost wanted to cry at the sheer power. It's hopeful, touching, and is just a spectacular testimony of how my God loves us all. To know that this is what my future brings - how can I ever feel discouraged? Because pain and struggle of the right now will eventually pass. So I would like to share this verse with all of you.
Revelations 21:4 (NKJ)
"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away."
So epic. What a much better ending that whatever people are theorizing about 2012. Except, well, it never really ends, now does it?
I found myself consumed by the Word earlier today while having a Bible study with a close friend of mine, and as these things often do we were led off of the path we originally intended on following and ended up talking about eternity.
It isn't something I've particularly thought about in depth lately, but the times I do think about it it has my head spinning. The concept of infinity - it's obviously something we're just not meant to truly comprehend in our human minds. As I discussed eternity today, however - this concept of forever - I wasn't slammed confusion or the disorienting of my mind, but rather felt a comforting blanket of peace and most distinctly, excitement, bubble up warmly in my stomach. I didn't take the time in the moment to try and discover why. I just knew I couldn't keep the goofy smile off of my face.
Now I have a chance to let that settle. What is it exactly that's so alluring about eternity - something that is so incomprehensible ? But I realize, it lies simply in this: to spend forever basking in the ever present glory of God...nothing seems better.
In fact, if I were to lay out my idea of perfection right now, describe what makes up my craziest, most coveted fantasies - that's what it is right there. Forever with my Lord, who I love so much, who loves me even more. Who knew paradise could be worded so simply? And the most amazing part is, it's so obtainable...in fact, it's already secured. Sometimes I lament over the fact that it seems like I have nothing to look forward to. Another day identical to the one last week, and maybe graduation is creeping around the corner, but that's still months away, and what happens after I'm handed my diploma, anyway?
But that's a foolish train of thought, because I have the most amazing thing waiting for me. It's certain, and it's wonderful, and I can't wait for perfection. I can't wait to be smiling all the time. I can't wait to bow before my Lord, and sing His praises in His very presence - forever! Being somewhat of a closet commitment-phobe who can hardly even stay still for more than a few minutes, the concept of forever should be frightening. But with the Lord involved, it just has me feeling like I'm floating.
The conversation of eternity naturally turned to what exactly will it be like once we're in this new Heaven and Earth. And of course, maybe details are foggy, widely left up to interpretation, but we came across this verse that describes it perfectly. As I read the words out loud, I almost wanted to cry at the sheer power. It's hopeful, touching, and is just a spectacular testimony of how my God loves us all. To know that this is what my future brings - how can I ever feel discouraged? Because pain and struggle of the right now will eventually pass. So I would like to share this verse with all of you.
Revelations 21:4 (NKJ)
"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away."
So epic. What a much better ending that whatever people are theorizing about 2012. Except, well, it never really ends, now does it?
"I Will Praise You, O Lord, With My Whole Heart"
From April 5, 2010
Way to perform at a Church on Easter Sunday and not mention God at all, Jonas Brothers.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMg79szKzLQ&feature=player_embedded
It’s one of those statements that borderline judgmental, I feel like. Maybe it completely dips in judgmental - I don’t know, but I can’t help but think these things sometimes. And I made an interesting discovery about myself -if I ever do find myself passing judgment, it’s not the non-Christians that I judge; it’s the Christians.
Either way, it’s wrong - I have no right to, and I like to think that I don’t do much judging, anyway. But being imperfect, a human sinner, I succumb to these thoughts every so often, and I hate that. I don’t want to judge anyone at all, ever. But these occasional thoughts stem from the fact that I just don’t understand. Christ is my LIFE, and I know I’m not always as open about Him as I should be, but what I aim to do with my life, I aim to do it for Him. So it’s hard to me to fathom how someone can be sitting at such a position of influence in an industry that everyone pays attention to, and not be so blatantly obvious about their faith. I’m not talking about just admitting to being a Christian - there’s so much more to our part in the world than that.
Some celebrities do a mighty fine job of it. I love following Tiffany Thornton on twitter - she’s explicit about her faith and mentions it often. But when it comes to the Jonas Brothers - yes, they stay out of trouble (at least as far as the public eye can tell) and flaunt their purity rings quite well, but four albums later, and you’ve got barely a handful of songs that maybe could be contributed to God? In interviews, on their twitters, wherever - they hardly talk about their faith anymore. They didn’t even mention God or Jesus in the “thank you” section of their latest album. At least Selena Gomez did that (don’t be surprised if you see a whole tumblr post about how I do like what she’s doing with her fame, for the most part). And Demi Lovato’s first paragraph in her thank you section is excellent.
I do commend them for whatever philanthropy work they do. For not being douchebags and having clean mouths and not (openly, at least, and I’m going to give them the benefit of the doubt) participating in lewd acts of debauchery. And that does put them quite a few steps ahead than most celebrities. But as Christians in such an influential spot, I can barely fathom the impact they could have if they openly engaged with their faith just a little more for the world to see. Can you imagine how many people would but a Christian album of theirs, just because they’re the Jonas Brothers? Goodness, if I was them, I would be trying to slip in Jesus’ name in every single interview I ever did. I’d be so outspoken, because man, these are people’s lives at stake.
At least, I hope I would. I do have the perspective and maturity to understand that I am observing all of this from a fifth-hand point of view, and to quote the catchy theme song of a popular children’s television show, everything is not what it seems. Maybe it’s not so easy, but I suppose part of me can’t help but think that maybe they’re just not trying hard enough.
And to watch the Jonas Brothers’ appearance at Saddleback Church and to hear no explicit mention of Jesus Christ - I don’t understand that. Nick implored people to “make the commitment [he] made and not let [miscellaneous problems] slow [them] down.” Um, how about in times of trouble (or should I say “trying times”), seek God and keep your faith in Him? You’re at a Church service on Easter - it’s okay to say God’s name, Nick.
I guess I’m just a firm believer - no matter who you are - that it’s just not enough to say you’re a Christian. Even in Hollywood, I think claiming Christianity is hardly detrimental to your reputation (especially when you’re a Disney star). It’s when you’re really open with it, bold about it, letting it be so obvious in every faucet of your life that perhaps the persecution comes, but isn’t glorifying our Lord and sharing the Word so much more important than worldy success? If their fanbase or their Disney contract is what’s stopping the Jonas Brothers from releasing a Christian album or doing whatever, then I say “Screw it.” They have money, they have influence, they have power - they should at least give a try. But (in the words of Joe’s fake girlfriend) baby, that’s just me.
I just know that I dream of Hollywood so I can be a influential Christian in Hollywood. I don’t dream of fame. I dream of glorifying my Lord by using the talents He’s given me. And I will do my best to share the love of Christ in all I do - implicitly and explicitly. Definitely not saying that I’m better than anyone - I’m definitely not at all. I just wish I’d hear more about the Jonas Brothers and their faith. And I’m still praying for a Christian album out of them. And actually really praying for a Christian album out of Demi Lovato - that would have me musically set for life.
On a completely separate note, why does Nick talk like a 60 year old black man that grew up playing the blues in bars down South? Nick Jonas and Justin Bieber - the Robin Thicke and Justin Timberlake of the tween generation.
And okay, I’m about to slip into super Christian mode right now, and I don’t care, but it honestly disgusts me to see a huge “I <3 Nick” banner at a Easter Church service. What?! That day is about JESUS, that service is about Jesus, and Nick Jonas is getting all of the glory? That just pisses me off. And not sure how I feel about a church service being turned into a Jonas Brothers concert, but at least people who may not have gone to church at all that day got a sermon, even if that was their original intent.
Anyway, those are just my thoughts.
Way to perform at a Church on Easter Sunday and not mention God at all, Jonas Brothers.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMg79szKzLQ&feature=player_embedded
It’s one of those statements that borderline judgmental, I feel like. Maybe it completely dips in judgmental - I don’t know, but I can’t help but think these things sometimes. And I made an interesting discovery about myself -if I ever do find myself passing judgment, it’s not the non-Christians that I judge; it’s the Christians.
Either way, it’s wrong - I have no right to, and I like to think that I don’t do much judging, anyway. But being imperfect, a human sinner, I succumb to these thoughts every so often, and I hate that. I don’t want to judge anyone at all, ever. But these occasional thoughts stem from the fact that I just don’t understand. Christ is my LIFE, and I know I’m not always as open about Him as I should be, but what I aim to do with my life, I aim to do it for Him. So it’s hard to me to fathom how someone can be sitting at such a position of influence in an industry that everyone pays attention to, and not be so blatantly obvious about their faith. I’m not talking about just admitting to being a Christian - there’s so much more to our part in the world than that.
Some celebrities do a mighty fine job of it. I love following Tiffany Thornton on twitter - she’s explicit about her faith and mentions it often. But when it comes to the Jonas Brothers - yes, they stay out of trouble (at least as far as the public eye can tell) and flaunt their purity rings quite well, but four albums later, and you’ve got barely a handful of songs that maybe could be contributed to God? In interviews, on their twitters, wherever - they hardly talk about their faith anymore. They didn’t even mention God or Jesus in the “thank you” section of their latest album. At least Selena Gomez did that (don’t be surprised if you see a whole tumblr post about how I do like what she’s doing with her fame, for the most part). And Demi Lovato’s first paragraph in her thank you section is excellent.
I do commend them for whatever philanthropy work they do. For not being douchebags and having clean mouths and not (openly, at least, and I’m going to give them the benefit of the doubt) participating in lewd acts of debauchery. And that does put them quite a few steps ahead than most celebrities. But as Christians in such an influential spot, I can barely fathom the impact they could have if they openly engaged with their faith just a little more for the world to see. Can you imagine how many people would but a Christian album of theirs, just because they’re the Jonas Brothers? Goodness, if I was them, I would be trying to slip in Jesus’ name in every single interview I ever did. I’d be so outspoken, because man, these are people’s lives at stake.
At least, I hope I would. I do have the perspective and maturity to understand that I am observing all of this from a fifth-hand point of view, and to quote the catchy theme song of a popular children’s television show, everything is not what it seems. Maybe it’s not so easy, but I suppose part of me can’t help but think that maybe they’re just not trying hard enough.
And to watch the Jonas Brothers’ appearance at Saddleback Church and to hear no explicit mention of Jesus Christ - I don’t understand that. Nick implored people to “make the commitment [he] made and not let [miscellaneous problems] slow [them] down.” Um, how about in times of trouble (or should I say “trying times”), seek God and keep your faith in Him? You’re at a Church service on Easter - it’s okay to say God’s name, Nick.
I guess I’m just a firm believer - no matter who you are - that it’s just not enough to say you’re a Christian. Even in Hollywood, I think claiming Christianity is hardly detrimental to your reputation (especially when you’re a Disney star). It’s when you’re really open with it, bold about it, letting it be so obvious in every faucet of your life that perhaps the persecution comes, but isn’t glorifying our Lord and sharing the Word so much more important than worldy success? If their fanbase or their Disney contract is what’s stopping the Jonas Brothers from releasing a Christian album or doing whatever, then I say “Screw it.” They have money, they have influence, they have power - they should at least give a try. But (in the words of Joe’s fake girlfriend) baby, that’s just me.
I just know that I dream of Hollywood so I can be a influential Christian in Hollywood. I don’t dream of fame. I dream of glorifying my Lord by using the talents He’s given me. And I will do my best to share the love of Christ in all I do - implicitly and explicitly. Definitely not saying that I’m better than anyone - I’m definitely not at all. I just wish I’d hear more about the Jonas Brothers and their faith. And I’m still praying for a Christian album out of them. And actually really praying for a Christian album out of Demi Lovato - that would have me musically set for life.
On a completely separate note, why does Nick talk like a 60 year old black man that grew up playing the blues in bars down South? Nick Jonas and Justin Bieber - the Robin Thicke and Justin Timberlake of the tween generation.
And okay, I’m about to slip into super Christian mode right now, and I don’t care, but it honestly disgusts me to see a huge “I <3 Nick” banner at a Easter Church service. What?! That day is about JESUS, that service is about Jesus, and Nick Jonas is getting all of the glory? That just pisses me off. And not sure how I feel about a church service being turned into a Jonas Brothers concert, but at least people who may not have gone to church at all that day got a sermon, even if that was their original intent.
Anyway, those are just my thoughts.
What I've Learned This Week
From May 23, 2010
It became evident to me around early Wednesday morning that God was doing something in my lfe. The pieces were just coming together so well - I knew it was the beginning of something in store, and that His presence was strong.
Sitting here on Sunday afternoon, it has just been further confirmed. There has been one thing especially in particular that God has shown me repeatedly this past week, and it’s mainly summed up to me in Matthew 7:13-14.
Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.
Being heavily surrounded by Christians who live very similar lifestyles to me most of the time in New York (ironically, because the Christian presence is small, but it’s strong), I don’t think about it so often. It creates this illusion that so many people are traveling down the narrow path, and with so much support, it doesn’t seem so hard.
But recently, I’ve seen the narrow path for what it truly is - empty. I’m trudging it alone, no one in sight. I picture it overgrown from lack of use; there’s barely even a defined path. And the words of the above verse ring true - and there are few who find it.
It’s striking how much that exact theme has come up amongst my friends this week. The friend I’ve seen all but one night since I’ve been home, the friend hundreds of miles away right now - like God just doesn’t want me to forget that people like me are truly one in a million. People who don’t drink, smoke, or sex, yes, but on a much larger and more important scale than that, people who feel compelled to actually live their lives right.
Why is it so important to know that there really is no one choosing that narrow path? Well, to expose the world as a whole as it really is - lost, hedonistic, and desolate. To encourage me (and anyone else) to stay on the narrow path; it is imperative, because someone has to do it. And lastly, as a calling to try and change the world. There are few of us, but we do exist. It’s fantastic that we choose to walk the narrow path, but it would be even better if we could influence others to do the same.
I’ve told myself before - I have to live my life right, I have to be better than the rest of them. And it’s not a pride thing, it’s not a way to feel better about myself. I have to do it, because someone has to. Someone has to be better, because goodness, this world is so messed, but as long as there’s still some of us fighting down the narrow path, then there’s hope.
It’s so important to share our faith. That’s what we’re here for, after all. I had been wrestling with it a little bit lately, but it is just so crucial. Why don’t we shout it out all the time? Fear, uncertainty…but it’s become increasingly evident to me (mostly thank to a wonderful testimony given by my best friend, Beth, this past week) that every single opportunity should be taken to share the good news. If there’s an opening, jump into it, because there’s not a single person on this Earth who doesn’t need Jesus, whether they realize it or not.
And of course I’ve struggled with the balance of passionately sharing my faith and coming off as overbearing and imposing. And though some discretion should be used, I guess, I realized last night as I was sharing the Gospel for the first time in over a year (which is a dang shame) that there is no balance. You’re either sharing your faith or you’re not. Now there are different approaches for different people, but mentioning Jesus once in a conversation and never bringing it up again because the person doesn’t seem receptive gets us nowhere. So that’s another thing I’ve learned - you can’t be a pansy about it, worrying about stepping on toes, because really, this is a matter of life and death.
Then there’s how all of these spiritual lessons tie into my dream (as in, ideal life direction, not nocturnal visions), which is at least encouraging, which is a nice balance against how discouraging it feels being a minority in every sense of the word. But something good’s gonna come out of it, I know.
So that’s what has been reiterated in my life this week. “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.” (Matthew 9:37) I won’t cite examples, but it is truly striking how much that has come up in life situations this week. But I just encourage my fellow Christians to stay strong - to know that even though there are few of us, we are never truly alone. This world is screwed up - but there is still hope abound. And it starts with us, reaching out, influencing, and most importantly, loving all of those around us. Then God can use us to make a real difference in this world.
“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.” 1 Corinthians 13: 1-3
God is good. Have a great day.
It became evident to me around early Wednesday morning that God was doing something in my lfe. The pieces were just coming together so well - I knew it was the beginning of something in store, and that His presence was strong.
Sitting here on Sunday afternoon, it has just been further confirmed. There has been one thing especially in particular that God has shown me repeatedly this past week, and it’s mainly summed up to me in Matthew 7:13-14.
Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.
Being heavily surrounded by Christians who live very similar lifestyles to me most of the time in New York (ironically, because the Christian presence is small, but it’s strong), I don’t think about it so often. It creates this illusion that so many people are traveling down the narrow path, and with so much support, it doesn’t seem so hard.
But recently, I’ve seen the narrow path for what it truly is - empty. I’m trudging it alone, no one in sight. I picture it overgrown from lack of use; there’s barely even a defined path. And the words of the above verse ring true - and there are few who find it.
It’s striking how much that exact theme has come up amongst my friends this week. The friend I’ve seen all but one night since I’ve been home, the friend hundreds of miles away right now - like God just doesn’t want me to forget that people like me are truly one in a million. People who don’t drink, smoke, or sex, yes, but on a much larger and more important scale than that, people who feel compelled to actually live their lives right.
Why is it so important to know that there really is no one choosing that narrow path? Well, to expose the world as a whole as it really is - lost, hedonistic, and desolate. To encourage me (and anyone else) to stay on the narrow path; it is imperative, because someone has to do it. And lastly, as a calling to try and change the world. There are few of us, but we do exist. It’s fantastic that we choose to walk the narrow path, but it would be even better if we could influence others to do the same.
I’ve told myself before - I have to live my life right, I have to be better than the rest of them. And it’s not a pride thing, it’s not a way to feel better about myself. I have to do it, because someone has to. Someone has to be better, because goodness, this world is so messed, but as long as there’s still some of us fighting down the narrow path, then there’s hope.
It’s so important to share our faith. That’s what we’re here for, after all. I had been wrestling with it a little bit lately, but it is just so crucial. Why don’t we shout it out all the time? Fear, uncertainty…but it’s become increasingly evident to me (mostly thank to a wonderful testimony given by my best friend, Beth, this past week) that every single opportunity should be taken to share the good news. If there’s an opening, jump into it, because there’s not a single person on this Earth who doesn’t need Jesus, whether they realize it or not.
And of course I’ve struggled with the balance of passionately sharing my faith and coming off as overbearing and imposing. And though some discretion should be used, I guess, I realized last night as I was sharing the Gospel for the first time in over a year (which is a dang shame) that there is no balance. You’re either sharing your faith or you’re not. Now there are different approaches for different people, but mentioning Jesus once in a conversation and never bringing it up again because the person doesn’t seem receptive gets us nowhere. So that’s another thing I’ve learned - you can’t be a pansy about it, worrying about stepping on toes, because really, this is a matter of life and death.
Then there’s how all of these spiritual lessons tie into my dream (as in, ideal life direction, not nocturnal visions), which is at least encouraging, which is a nice balance against how discouraging it feels being a minority in every sense of the word. But something good’s gonna come out of it, I know.
So that’s what has been reiterated in my life this week. “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.” (Matthew 9:37) I won’t cite examples, but it is truly striking how much that has come up in life situations this week. But I just encourage my fellow Christians to stay strong - to know that even though there are few of us, we are never truly alone. This world is screwed up - but there is still hope abound. And it starts with us, reaching out, influencing, and most importantly, loving all of those around us. Then God can use us to make a real difference in this world.
“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.” 1 Corinthians 13: 1-3
God is good. Have a great day.
Ephesians 5:18
From May 23, 2010
“Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.”
God is enough for me. It’s not about the “do not” here. I don’t abstain from alcohol because of a law, a commandment, because “I’m not supposed to drink.”
There’s nothing wrong with a drink. Yeah, I said it, and I truly believe it. There’s nothing wrong with two drinks, three drinks, whatever. But when it becomes a substitution for something real - a shallow means of fulfillment or enjoyment, something that transforms your state of mind into something unrecognizable - then that’s a problem. Though personally, I think the act as a whole - no matter the quantity - is pointless (not wrong, but pointless), but that’s just me. But intoxication has to be one of the more pathetic things I have ever witnessed.
And I do not want to be filled with that when I have the Holy Spirit. All I ever want to be filled up with is God. It’s not that I don’t drink because I’m not supposed to. I don’t drink because I don’t like it. And because I have something so so so much better.
As I wrote on July 26, 2009 in a facebook note:
“I want to breathe in the fresh air, get naturally high off the endless supply of oxygen. Yet I want to be completely sober for every second of my life - the amazingly good, the heartbreakingly bad, the obnoxiously average - just to experience it in utmost clarity and take every single second in, because I’m never going to get those seconds back, and we’re all running out of seconds, aren’t we?”
That sums it up for me right there. You do what you do. Honestly, I’ll love you all the same. But don’t for a second try to make me out to be ridiculous because I refuse to use anything as crutch. I swear, if I get one more incredulous look, one more “Oh, loosen up and have a drink”…
That’s all. Agree with me, be pissed with me, ignore me, but that’s how I feel about the matter. And believe me, this is not a blog of condemnation. This is one of self-justification. Defending my beliefs as opposed to putting down anybody else’s.
“Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.”
God is enough for me. It’s not about the “do not” here. I don’t abstain from alcohol because of a law, a commandment, because “I’m not supposed to drink.”
There’s nothing wrong with a drink. Yeah, I said it, and I truly believe it. There’s nothing wrong with two drinks, three drinks, whatever. But when it becomes a substitution for something real - a shallow means of fulfillment or enjoyment, something that transforms your state of mind into something unrecognizable - then that’s a problem. Though personally, I think the act as a whole - no matter the quantity - is pointless (not wrong, but pointless), but that’s just me. But intoxication has to be one of the more pathetic things I have ever witnessed.
And I do not want to be filled with that when I have the Holy Spirit. All I ever want to be filled up with is God. It’s not that I don’t drink because I’m not supposed to. I don’t drink because I don’t like it. And because I have something so so so much better.
As I wrote on July 26, 2009 in a facebook note:
“I want to breathe in the fresh air, get naturally high off the endless supply of oxygen. Yet I want to be completely sober for every second of my life - the amazingly good, the heartbreakingly bad, the obnoxiously average - just to experience it in utmost clarity and take every single second in, because I’m never going to get those seconds back, and we’re all running out of seconds, aren’t we?”
That sums it up for me right there. You do what you do. Honestly, I’ll love you all the same. But don’t for a second try to make me out to be ridiculous because I refuse to use anything as crutch. I swear, if I get one more incredulous look, one more “Oh, loosen up and have a drink”…
That’s all. Agree with me, be pissed with me, ignore me, but that’s how I feel about the matter. And believe me, this is not a blog of condemnation. This is one of self-justification. Defending my beliefs as opposed to putting down anybody else’s.
Last One For Awhile, I Swear
From May 23, 2010
I probably won’t have this one feed through to my facebook, because I’ve already clogged that up enough. It’s just my dear followers on twitter and on here that get to see this pop up. Or people who are really really quick on facebook haha
But I wanted to update my facebook status, and finally settled on putting the verse about praying without ceasing. But the way my brain works is that I never remember details. I know the verses, but I never know where they’re found. So I googled “pray without ceasing.”
Turns out the exact verse is 1 Thessalonians 5:17. But the only words in that verse are literally “pray without ceasing” - there’s no context, so I looked up the entire chapter.
Two crazy things about this. First, this is the exact group of verse that the youth pastor at the church I went to with Beth was talking about on Wednesday. Very interesting coincidence, except that I don’t believe in coincidence - I believe in GOD.
Secondly, as I was reading through the entire chapter, the word that jumps out at me is “drunk.” Funny, because as you may know, the tumblr entry I just wrote was about alcohol. As I read further, though, I realize that that part of the chapter EXACTLY goes with the “theme of the week”, as noted in my very first tumblr post of today. Verse 5-10, especially - it compliments perfectly the verse about the narrow versus wide path that I’ve been coming back to all week.
All in all, God is amazing in the way He has been connecting things together in my life recently. Like, that is all God. All God. He’s definitely telling me a whole lot of something here. And I love Him.
I probably won’t have this one feed through to my facebook, because I’ve already clogged that up enough. It’s just my dear followers on twitter and on here that get to see this pop up. Or people who are really really quick on facebook haha
But I wanted to update my facebook status, and finally settled on putting the verse about praying without ceasing. But the way my brain works is that I never remember details. I know the verses, but I never know where they’re found. So I googled “pray without ceasing.”
Turns out the exact verse is 1 Thessalonians 5:17. But the only words in that verse are literally “pray without ceasing” - there’s no context, so I looked up the entire chapter.
Two crazy things about this. First, this is the exact group of verse that the youth pastor at the church I went to with Beth was talking about on Wednesday. Very interesting coincidence, except that I don’t believe in coincidence - I believe in GOD.
Secondly, as I was reading through the entire chapter, the word that jumps out at me is “drunk.” Funny, because as you may know, the tumblr entry I just wrote was about alcohol. As I read further, though, I realize that that part of the chapter EXACTLY goes with the “theme of the week”, as noted in my very first tumblr post of today. Verse 5-10, especially - it compliments perfectly the verse about the narrow versus wide path that I’ve been coming back to all week.
All in all, God is amazing in the way He has been connecting things together in my life recently. Like, that is all God. All God. He’s definitely telling me a whole lot of something here. And I love Him.
Oh, how He Loves Us.
From June 28, 2010
Our God is so good. The best thing happened today.
But it starts on Thursday, when at the Bible study I attend, we sang the worship song - “Oh, How He Loves Us.” I like that song. It was nice.
The next day, one of my friend’s (who was not at the Bible study) had the lyrics to the song as his facebook status. I commented on it.
On Saturday, the song came up while I was talking to Beth on the phone.
So that song’s been on my mind. So today at church during worship, I was thinking how I really wanted to sing that song. This was in the middle of upbeat, gospel style music, and though Times Square Church does slow it down some at the end of the “set”, I couldn’t remember if we’d ever even sang that song at that church before when I’d been there, and it’s a completely different style of song than we were singing, so I just figured we wouldn’t sing it. Still, I prayed that we would.
Worship continues. I’ve moved on in my head, forgotten about my small prayer. As anticipated, the songs we’re singing start getting slower. Then all of a sudden, the lead woman is singing, “He is jealous for Me…”
I about freaked (in a good way). I don’t believe in coincidences - that was totally God, answering my prayer. And it seems small, but it just confirmed what I was singing - He loves us. So so much. It was just so awesome that we sang that song in church this week. Not last week or the week before, but this week, when I really wanted to sing it.
And oh, it gets better.
So that’s the last song we sing, and one of the pastors gets up to transition. Now during my Bible study earlier today, before church, I came across a few verses in 2 Thessalonians about how God has chosen us for salvation, how we were called, etc. So I wrote about how I really am so blessed to have been called to this, but also lamented over those not fortune enough. How I truly desired that everyone could experience this, that everyone could be saved.
Well, when the pastor was talking, the first thing he says is to the extent of “how privileged we are to be able to sing ‘Oh, how He loves us’ and know that, but there are so many people who do not know this.” And I was like “Bam! That is EXACTLY what I was mulling over earlier.” I just love it when God reiterates things when you’re not expecting it.
So lesson of the day. He loves us. We’re blessed to be able to experience it. But now we need to go and share it so that everyone else can experience it, too.
Dang, I love my God.
Our God is so good. The best thing happened today.
But it starts on Thursday, when at the Bible study I attend, we sang the worship song - “Oh, How He Loves Us.” I like that song. It was nice.
The next day, one of my friend’s (who was not at the Bible study) had the lyrics to the song as his facebook status. I commented on it.
On Saturday, the song came up while I was talking to Beth on the phone.
So that song’s been on my mind. So today at church during worship, I was thinking how I really wanted to sing that song. This was in the middle of upbeat, gospel style music, and though Times Square Church does slow it down some at the end of the “set”, I couldn’t remember if we’d ever even sang that song at that church before when I’d been there, and it’s a completely different style of song than we were singing, so I just figured we wouldn’t sing it. Still, I prayed that we would.
Worship continues. I’ve moved on in my head, forgotten about my small prayer. As anticipated, the songs we’re singing start getting slower. Then all of a sudden, the lead woman is singing, “He is jealous for Me…”
I about freaked (in a good way). I don’t believe in coincidences - that was totally God, answering my prayer. And it seems small, but it just confirmed what I was singing - He loves us. So so much. It was just so awesome that we sang that song in church this week. Not last week or the week before, but this week, when I really wanted to sing it.
And oh, it gets better.
So that’s the last song we sing, and one of the pastors gets up to transition. Now during my Bible study earlier today, before church, I came across a few verses in 2 Thessalonians about how God has chosen us for salvation, how we were called, etc. So I wrote about how I really am so blessed to have been called to this, but also lamented over those not fortune enough. How I truly desired that everyone could experience this, that everyone could be saved.
Well, when the pastor was talking, the first thing he says is to the extent of “how privileged we are to be able to sing ‘Oh, how He loves us’ and know that, but there are so many people who do not know this.” And I was like “Bam! That is EXACTLY what I was mulling over earlier.” I just love it when God reiterates things when you’re not expecting it.
So lesson of the day. He loves us. We’re blessed to be able to experience it. But now we need to go and share it so that everyone else can experience it, too.
Dang, I love my God.
Verses of the Week
From July 11, 2010
For the past week, every day after I’ve done my quiet times, I’ve taken specific note of the passages that grabbed at me the most that day. Now that it has been seven days, I’ve decided to share them here.
Note: Couldn’t really narrow it down to one today, so consider it a Sunday bonus. Also, for your reference, my Bible is in New King James. And I apologize for anything out of context.
Monday, July 05
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Tuesday, July 06
James 1:26-27
If anyone among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless. Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.
Wednesday, July 07
James 2:13
For judgment is without mercy to the one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.
Thursday, July 08
I Peter 1:3-9
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing, you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, receiving the end of your faith - the salvation of your souls.
Friday, July 09
I Peter 3:15
But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;
Saturday, July 10
2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not will that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.
Sunday, July 11
I John 2:15-17
Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world - the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life - is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.
I John 3:16
By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.
I John 4:4
You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
I John 4:12
No one has seen God at any time. If we love one another, God abides in us, and His love has been perfected in us.
1 John 4:18-19
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We love Him because He first loved us.
Amen!
For the past week, every day after I’ve done my quiet times, I’ve taken specific note of the passages that grabbed at me the most that day. Now that it has been seven days, I’ve decided to share them here.
Note: Couldn’t really narrow it down to one today, so consider it a Sunday bonus. Also, for your reference, my Bible is in New King James. And I apologize for anything out of context.
Monday, July 05
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Tuesday, July 06
James 1:26-27
If anyone among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless. Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.
Wednesday, July 07
James 2:13
For judgment is without mercy to the one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.
Thursday, July 08
I Peter 1:3-9
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing, you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, receiving the end of your faith - the salvation of your souls.
Friday, July 09
I Peter 3:15
But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;
Saturday, July 10
2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not will that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.
Sunday, July 11
I John 2:15-17
Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world - the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life - is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.
I John 3:16
By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.
I John 4:4
You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
I John 4:12
No one has seen God at any time. If we love one another, God abides in us, and His love has been perfected in us.
1 John 4:18-19
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We love Him because He first loved us.
Amen!
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