January 17, 2012
So my perception of fame has changed a lot sine October 5, 2007, when I decided that I wanted to be famous. I mean, there was always a bit of God in my motives, but I think I’d be a liar if I said He was my main, driving force. No, it was my love for attention, my passion for entertainment, that spurred that goal. And goodness, what a despicable goal. “I want to be famous.” That’s not about the work or my talents, but the glory. I wanted to be known.
Cue four years of God changing my heart. There’s little doubt that He put some form of that desire on my heart. It was just my human nature - that pesky flesh - that took ahold of it and corrupted it, leaving God with a lot of work to do within me before I could get anywhere.
And goodness, there’s no way I cannot believe in the Lord, His power, and His love, because it was not on my own accord or just by way of life that the desire I had for fame - a desire that literally ate at my stomach for weeks: it was such a striking, physical sensation constantly stabbing at me until it practically led me to despair - was steadily transformed into a distinct opposition against having such a goal.
God revealed to me the selfishness of my heart. Even though in the “peaks”of my desire for fame I did truly want to use it as a means to share God’s love widely, there were also other motivations there that were distinctly not of God’s character. He chipped away at that steadily, though - thank goodness - to the point where I became completely averse to fame. I truly felt like having fame was an undesirable thing that I wouldn’t at all be happy with - and believe me, that’s a complete 180 from where I was at 18, 19, and some of 20.
God was not finished with me there with this fame thing, however. He began to bring my attention to certain things. Twitter, for starters, and the celebrities with literally millions of followers, who were just wasting that. Celebrities who have at times said they have a faith in Christ, yet not mentioning a single thing about Him ever. Five million people at their disposal, ready to be influenced - gosh, what a platform that would be. And celebrities are rarely against pushing their own agendas - social, political, personal - and it’s often to incredible results, but there’s not really anyone in such a position of social influence doing that for Christ…
Which brings in Exhibit B - Tim Tebow. The now famous NFL quarterback who does not hesitate to throw all glory to God, to preach the Gospel openly, to live in the love of Jesus. And people are taking notice. By not being afraid to use his position in the spotlight to share the message of Jesus, he is reaching so many. And it began to dawn on me - the advantage of fame. Though still convinced in the selfishness of pursuing fame, especially in the way that most do, I can see now that if I were to become famous, the possibilities are endless. The key would simply be to make fame not at all, even in the least bit, for my glory, but entirely for God’s. To turn it over completely to Jesus. His fame, essentially. Not mine.
I don’t believe in “pursuing fame for the sake of God”, because that seems to make God the secondary goal, as well as implying that you cannot bring glory to God without being famous. I’ve accepted and embraced that I can certainly do God’s work and reach many people with the gifts He’s given me without fame even being remotely apart of the equation. To say I’m trying to become famous for Him seems ridiculous, still seems more self-motivated than anyway, as well as self-controlling - trying to pursue my own way of life as opposed to letting God take the lead, like He’s supposed to.
To decide for myself “This is the way God is going to use me” and trying to get to a certain place before I let Him use me instead of letting myself be used for His will in the present and letting HIm take me where He deems fit - I don’t think that’s how it should be. But if I follow Him, use my gifts to His glory, and give my all to Him, and He ends up leading me to fame as a result - then I know how it absolutely must be used.
It’s not “try to become famous and use it for God” - it’s simply live my life always for God and follow Him wherever He leads me, whether that be general obscurity or worldwide renown. I just know that the amount of people who know who I am and what I’m doing does not measure my success. I know that even the amount of people I reach does not measure my success. It is simply letting God use me in all circumstances, letting Him use me to touch any life, knowing that heaven rejoices over even just one soul that comes to Jesus.
And if my art never reaches some place of wide recognition - then whatever. I’m far from fame, but there’s no doubt in my mind that God has already used my humor, films, and music to touch plenty of people. Fame won’t validate my creativity or purpose. God does that. And I’m just to give it all for His use, whether He wants to use it to reach ten people or ten million. Either way, His purpose is accomplished in the end, and that’s more than good enough for me.
But if He does want to use it to reach ten million - then I’m not opposed to that. No longer seeking that fate with all I got, but from an evangelistic prospective, there is a great advantage to having millions of people watching everything you do. And I do think that would be amazing. Much like with money, fame in itself isn’t a bad thing - it’s your attitude towards it, what you do with it that decides that. So if I am to ever be famous, I wouldn’t hate it. I don’t say that ironically - really, I’d just be fine with it.
But I feel part of me kind of starting to want fame again, in a much different way than I ever have before. It’s not a desire that’s consuming me, eating away at me - nothing that I’m obsessing over. Because it’s honestly not about my own recognition, attention or achievement, but rather it’s one moment playing in my head right now: At the grace of God being able to win an Oscar, stepping before all those people, those cameras, a nationwide audience and not thanking a laundry list of people, but rather straight up sharing the Gospel.
But if I never get that moment, it’s all good. I just pray that someone takes advantage of that moment in that way, and I will be more than satisfied to live out my life in the way God deems for me.
God had changed my heart so much that it’s incredible. It’s all on Him, that’s for sure, and I’m so grateful to Him for all that He has revealed to me, for continually sanctifying me - for saving me in the first place.
Lastly on fame - I pray that there will be more Tim Tebows in the world. In each industry, using the “spotlight” for Jesus. I pray that these Christians who are famous start using their fame to openly share Jesus. That they’ll realize that faith is not a private matter. If our faith is something we really cherish, really hold as important…if Jesus is to us what we say He is - why wouldn’t we want to share the wonderful love that has touched our lives so deeply to the point that we’re willing to call ourselves Christians? We wouldn’t have known Jesus if someone hadn’t told us - so whether we’re famous or not, I pray that we’re all led and convicted to share the amazing love of Christ with as many people as we can. Let’s not be selfish with it. Let’s not care what people think especially, because what people think certainly won’t matter once we’re off this Earth. In fact, we may take a look around and regret that we ever cared what people thought…
I think that’s what stops many “famous Christians” the most - fear of losing their fame, or even the opportunity to do what made them famous, by so openly endorsing and speaking about their faith. But I say that if I ever do become famous, I’m gonna speak about my faith until I do lose it. Then keep speaking about it even after that. If speaking about Christ is a surefire way to lose fame, then I’m gonna do all I can to lose it.
But really, that’s how it should be, regardless of fame. And that’s the ultimate lesson I’ve learned here - God can and will use us for His glory, no matter what the circumstance. Doesn’t matter if I’m famous or not - I’m still going all out on The Great Commission. There is always someone to be reached and influenced in our lives, after all.
Matthew 28:18-20
And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
Acts 1:8
“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”
And that’s the past four years of my life for you.
